I used https://randombible.org/ but it seems like the bible is just a series of random stories that make no sense.
this post was submitted on 07 Mar 2025
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I was actually asked to leave my parents church because I was loudly arguing with the guy running a gift shop that if I were to follow Jesus, I should be flipping these tables, chasing them with whips, and damming them for turning gods house into a place of business occupied by thieves.
I guess they DON'T like considering what Jesus would do.
Yikes, I got a tough one.
“Don’t be alarmed,” he said. “You are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, who was crucified. He has risen! He is not here. See the place where they laid him.”
— Mark 16:6
Isaiah 43:4 "Because you are precious in my eyes, and honored, and I love you, I give men in return for you, peoples in exchange for your life." from: Random Bible Verse Generator
This verse expresses God's profound love and esteem for His people. He considers them precious and honored, willing to make significant sacrifices on their behalf. This serves as a reminder to believers of their immeasurable value in God's eyes and encourages them to respond with gratitude and trust in His love.
They’d just take this as evidence of institutionalized persecution against Christians
Isn't the old testament more hardcore than the new one ? Jewish roulette would seem more risky than christian roulette
I mean, obviously Jesus would get arrested by modern "christians" for being a "leftist hippie commie"
Again with the begatting!
I got Law-ception
"All who sin apart from the law will also perish apart from the law, and all who sin under the law will be judged by the law."
Just... go to jail.. or don't... I don't know..
"Not the goats again!"
Oh come on. Most of the bible is boring stuff.
Oh I don't doubt they exist. Just haven't seen before.
Let's industrialize this particular potential blasphemy.
https://dailyverses.net/random-bible-verse
Ed: > Truly I tell you, if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in their heart but believes that what they say will happen, it will be done for them.
Mark 11:23
Hey at least I'm not going to prison.
Get wisdom, get understanding; do not forget my words or turn away from them.
do not forget my words or turn away from them
Yeah, prison
This one claims to be truly random, I suspect yours is rigged to be more positive.
https://searchthebible.com/truly_random_bible_verse.php
Example:
3: And hath gone and served other gods, and worshipped them, either the sun, or moon, or any of the host of heaven, which I have not commanded; 4: And it be told thee, and thou hast heard of it, and inquired diligently, and, behold, it be true, and the thing certain, that such abomination is wrought in Israel:
5: Then shalt thou bring forth that man or that woman, which have committed that wicked thing, unto thy gates, even that man or that woman, and shalt stone them with stones, till they die.
6: At the mouth of two witnesses, or three witnesses, shall he that is worthy of death be put to death; but at the mouth of one witness he shall not be put to death.
7: The hands of the witnesses shall be first upon him to put him to death, and afterward the hands of all the people. So thou shalt put the evil away from among you.
Prison it is.
I think I can own a Canadian legally now, though. Get a pardon for trying, anyway.
opens bible. Points at random verse. Ezekiel 23:20.
😨
I’m working on my salting with fire technique but not much progress yet.