this post was submitted on 16 Feb 2025
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Based off of the try-hard linkedin douches I know I'd say:
- The Art of War
- Meditations by Marcus Aurelius
- The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
- Rich-dad poor-dad
- The Art of the Deal
If this is the approach, Infinite Jest and War and Peace are solid options. Maybe Oversized Penises for Dummies.
Fuck great call. I thought having two "war" novels might make the joke worse but Infinite Jest is peak big brain public masturbation reading material
Lol, I literally got called out for reading Infinite Jest on a bus. Wasn't a flex, the bus was just my primary reading time on weekdays and it was on my 'to finish' list.
Agreed that I probably looked like a jackass.
Habits of Highly Successful People
If you mean reading performatively ALOUD on public transportation, there's only one choice: The Bible, King James Version.
While I agree I prefer the Ving Rhames version
just realized I was actually in possession of the LeAnn Rimes version, unbeknownst to me
Just to be clear, I meant the Bible X Lebron James edition.
For sure!
saw they caught Bronny with the King Von edition on ESPN in a wild turn of events
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Do they have The Meats™?
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Oh god do people think you're being performative when you read in public transport?
Only people who don't read.
House of Leaves. That way if anyone notices you’re holding it upside down they’ll just think you’re really into it. And if anyone asks you what it’s about you can say “I have no fucking clue what’s happening, there’s a house I think?” and you’ll be correct.
Um. I think it's pretty easy to understand, but it's all a meta-narrative with an unreliable narrator.
The narrative devices are quite ingenious.
I love the book, just gently poking fun.
I watched a video essay on MyHouse.wad. I've never played Doom or read House of Leaves. Now I don't need to do either.
Surviving Life With Your Gigantic Penis by Chris Boden.
Yes, that's the title of an actual book.
Lolita while furrowing your brow and shaking your head so everyone knows you disagree with the protagonist's actions.
Moby Dick. It is free, unnecessarily long, really wordy, and mostly boring.
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Can reccomend the the epic of Gilgamesh, just be sure you don't actually enjoy reading it, or else you'd just be reading on the bus...
Is the new thing making fun of people who read on the train? I do it all the time ☹️
John said "reading performatively" - so, unless you're doing that...
Thankfully the people in charge of deciding whether your actions are performative or not have great judgment
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Is there a book about how Ayn Rand was a total piece of shit that helped ruin America?
A nearly monotone, apathetic reading of The Stranger or The Plague.
The dictionary
A Critique of Pure Reason
Can't go wrong with Hobbit and LOTR!
It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to.
Anything by Chuck Tingle
Go Dog, Go!
Do you like my hat?
You can never go wrong with the classic, Turtleneck top, glases (not optional), sneakers, Ulysses.
There is a more modern way though, bring a travel chessboard and do random moves, then look at your phone type somethgin, wait, and then make another random move.
Real talk, H.G. Wells was a fantastic author and his biggest hits are both immediately recognizable enough to be a performative conversation starter while also having the added bonus/hazard of potentially accidentally getting into it.
War of the Worlds, The Time Machine and The Invisible Man are all ones I've recently listened via Librivox (I linked the specific readers I listened to) during my commutes, but of course, my goal is to actually enjoy the books
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