Here we are, with both our military and the FBI among other government agencies, being destroyed from within. Our enemies are all laughing at us.
this post was submitted on 10 Oct 2026
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Oh allies too
They're really not laughing too much.
He's so stupid it's astounding.
That's a BIG part of why he was hired: stupid and/or deranged loyalists are much more likely to follow a capricious and despotic leader blindly than smart and sane people of equal loyalty and ideology.
Want to join the FBI? First, you must demonstrate proficiency at mixed martial arts. Second, you must possess a deep desire to be penetrated by a horse's cock. If you meet those criteria, congratulations! You officially qualify to be an agent in the FBI!
That won't make us question their competence, or dick size, at all.
They are such a parody, it's incredible.
Except it's not, because it's about loyalty to the leader, not any kind of efficiency or sense.
They're all so fucking stupid...
"This is a delicate negotiation and we must be careful." "No way man! Just kick him in the fucking head!".
Now, the first thing to learn is that in the real world chairs do not come apart. You must secure your chair and not let the other guy have it!
Why not WWE?
But wait, what is that?! It is the son of the assassinated Iranian leader Khamemei, and he has a foldable chair!
Because they admitted to their fights being staged for tax reasons*. Even the cult members wouldn't approve of the FBI being taught by what basically amounts to fight dancing stunt performers. At least I don't think so 🤷🏻
*That's to say that they admitted it to pay less tax, not that they discovered a tax loophole requiring staged matches
Will they carry their registered folding chair with them at all times?
I thought that was WWE
No knees to the head of a grounded enemy combatant? What about 12 to 6 elbows?
Soccer kicks and head stomps? Pride rules?
To be fair, I would absolutely dish out for a pay-for-view to see Patel take a savage beating from an MMA fighter.
I would pay to see took get the shit beat out of him by a reasonably healthy grandma
An mma fight against a pug would be over way too fast
I can see this being useful for when they need to do a a heel-turn for Good-Cop-Bad-Cop interrogations.
This really is the dumbest timeline
Wait to see tomorrow's timeline for something even dumber!
I heard he's trying to rename the Atlantic or Pacific now.
Edit: you know who I mean
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I had to pause a lovely Joni Mitchell song to rant at my wife about this one.
They paved paradise and put up a parking lot~
A parking lot is fucking useful.
They paved paradise and erected a gaudy oversized monument to an achivement they didnt accomplish that serves no purpose other than giving the paving job and monument construction to a friend of their administration and then banned public access.
I'd suggest some Carol King to help ease those nerves
Will America's next war be fought in the Octagon?
They going to demolish the Pentagon to add three more sides.
Penrose tile shape or GTFO.
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That would actually be a more civilized way of dealing with international conflicts than what we have on the deck right now.
No, it will be in a monster truck rally discretely labeled "rehabilitation".
Lol I was just thinking this again, the fights, the monster trucks and electrolytes!
welcome to cartoon usa.
I was hoping WWE would win the contract, oh well
You're not going to believe this, but the UFC and WWE have the same owner and trade under the stock symbol "TKO".
Crazy!
Wow. White must need a lot of money laundered.
We have have a sycophantic boot licker! Quick! Get him some government money!
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