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A collection of some classic Lemmy memes for your enjoyment
To be fair, back when you had 700 paper resumes on your desk, one that was clean and from a nice envelope would get you at the very least noticed.
Now you just have 700 entries in a portal with no way to tell who actually knows what they're talking about or which ones used and AI and the best you have is to throw away em-dashes and emojis.
Some years ago I knew someone at the company I wanted to apply at, asked them about the employer, and then doodled my face on a piece of toilet paper. 15 minutes later HR called me back.
*slight exaggeration, but it really wasn't hard.
Yes, connections bypass the nightmare that is HR hiring. I don't think anyone doesn't know that. But they built systems to ostensibly hire people, it isn't crazy to be filled with rage that those systems don't do shit.
That's why it's important to make friends. I'd never ask someone I don't know to vouch for me. And I would never vouch for someone just in my contacts. Be a friend, be loyal to them. That's the network I'll happily rely on.
A few years after I got hired my boss mentioned that they had hundreds of applicants, but my resume stood out because I included a custom cover letter.
This was my first job after I graduated college in 1992. That was in the days when you could pick up a newspaper and see job listings in the classified section.
I admitted to my boss that the cover letter was a mail merge document. I had created a spreadsheet listing the name, address, etc. for dozens of positions from the classifieds and added one sentence specific to the job for every one.
The job was in IT, so it probably turns out that faking a custom cover letter counted as proof of qualifications.
Every job I've had since then was due to networking that all ties back to that first job.
I worked at a McDonald's as a teen. Someone came through the drive thru and gave me their application. I immediately gave it to my manager who proceeded to throw it away in front of me. His reason was that the person didn't care enough about the job or some bullshit. I was then ordered to throw away any other applications received through the drive thru.
I hated that job
Burger King vibes, I worked a lot of fast food places when I was younger but Burger King was the most dreadful, disorganized place. McDonald’s already won the burger wars like 50 years ago and Burger King is in no rush to innovate at all.
It really depends on the location.
Yeah, I guess I was broadly speaking about their actual corporate procedures though. Like at BK you’re supposed to just magically know how much of the ingredients go on each sandwich whereas McDonald’s has the self-measuring salt shaker, ketchup, mustard, etc. dispensers.
Lol. My ex wife used orange paper once saying that it would be good to stand out. She didn't even get an interview. She was about 36 at the time.
I had a boss have a stack of resumes dropped on his desk, he saw a yellow one in the pile and immediately picked it out and tossed it without reading it.
I was like what the heck, and he said something like " they wanted to stand out and they did, goodbye"
Performative dickery. I hate that people like that get promoted.
Made me chuckle.
So no standing out. And no gaps in the CV. But also only about 70% of your really not made-up points have to match. Should i beg you for exploiting my skills or what?
I don't understand this 😜
Complaint about the sillyness of the job market and how bosses want to see their worker bees as under them instead of as equal contractors. "Be glad that you get a job" instead of "Be glad that i work for you", despite the company also paying the "overhead" (the larger, the more) with your work.
There's some nuance of course (founding a company and keeping it running is not easy), but the larger ones, where the founder is long gone, are purely for consolidation and exploitation of people's work. And going stock market, makes companies evil.
Cotton paper is some good shit. Too bad ai can't see the material I'd otherwise print it on, because otherwise I'd be hired immediately
That shit went so hard in 1981 tho
The watermark was iStock printing going all over the face photo. It could mean two things: either I was a real celebrity, or. I didn't want to explore what this "or" could've ment, so I smiled in all of my 32 trying to come off as at least a niche celebrity.