this post was submitted on 01 Jun 2026
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I'm thinking about getting a masturbator for the time after my wife has given birth. But I have no idea where to even start. Anyone here using one, and can share some experiences?

I am searching for something that:

  • is easy to clean,
  • can fit my whole dick such that I can fuck it like a vagina, and
  • maybe has some extras like vibration or suction or so.
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[–] IronBird@lemmy.world 2 points 10 hours ago

tenga has a number of good ones, proper vibrating ones will run yoy 150-200$+, fairly cheap "spinners" (<100$) which work well enough though

don't beat the real thing but much better than manual

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org -1 points 13 hours ago

I've heard that those things can cause people to become dependent on them to climax. Not everyone, I'm sure, but I wouldn't risk it. I've been a hands-on man all my life (except for a couple experiments with assistive devices when I was a teenager).

Btw, congrats! You probably won't have energy enough to masturbate for a while.

[–] wesker@lemmy.sdf.org 17 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Hand 1, or if you're feeling particularly spicy, Hand 2.

[–] Krusty@quokk.au 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Spit or dry? These are the deliberations of our lives.

[–] wesker@lemmy.sdf.org 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Level up, keep a bottle of lube on hand.

[–] Krusty@quokk.au 1 points 1 day ago

I just use pork lard. Finger licking good.

[–] alanjaow@lemmy.world 9 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I went to the local sex shop (the employee was surprised, but totally willing to help after she was sure I wasn't gonna be creepy) and only found one that would fit, since it was open-ended. The others were like 4 inches max, which doesn't allow for the satisfying thrust at the end. All the ones with any fancy features were in the hundreds of dollars, but were still limited in size. I ended up going with a $25 one that was basically a tube of textured silicone, open at the end for easier cleanup.

In short, go to a sex shop and look around :)

[–] lotharmatthaeus@lemmy.zip 6 points 1 day ago

Maybe that's what I'll have to do in the end. Luckily we have a nice one where I visited with the wife before.

[–] eestileib@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 1 day ago (4 children)

(woman talking)

I dated a guy who had an adjustable flashlight and he really liked it (and it was fun to use on him as a nice side effect).

[–] Semester3383@lemmy.world 1 points 13 hours ago

Guy here - I'm not a fan. Lube dries out in them REALLY fast, IMO, and you can't use silicone lube safely. If they made one that constantly added small amounts of lube, they'd be great.

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 1 points 20 hours ago

adjustable flashlight

hmmm...autocorrect strikes again.

[–] lotharmatthaeus@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Sounds interesting. What do you mean by adjustable?

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 2 points 20 hours ago

What does she mean by flashlight?

[–] eestileib@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 day ago

There was a dial on the end that let you control how hard it gripped, there was a particular setting and pace he definitely preferred.

[–] Krusty@quokk.au -1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

You should try a shampoo bottle.

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 2 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

the big ones with handles from Costco.

[–] Krusty@quokk.au 2 points 19 hours ago

At a medium pace.

[–] SynonymousStoat@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

Look up Tenga, specifically the "flip" series. They have other toys that are full sized and on the cheaper side, but they likely won't last as long.

[–] PP_BOY_@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

Uj/ get an open ended one otherwise youre gonna nut and clean one out once and realize it's not worth the hassle

[–] BingBong@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Full sized flashlight with texture. It doesn't have electronics bit the full size are deep and easy to clean.

[–] Krusty@quokk.au -1 points 1 day ago

But can you take bong rips from it?

[–] 7uWqKj@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] lotharmatthaeus@lemmy.zip 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

They don't seem to have anything where you can actually put your whole dick inside?

[–] Krusty@quokk.au 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Just get the thang that electrocutes your wang.

[–] mr_account@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] PhoenixDog@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

Best orgasm of my life.

[–] atro_city@fedia.io 2 points 1 day ago (3 children)

That's actually a good question. I'm curious about the responses. Didn't know these things existed and just searching for them popped up an immense null

My issue would be the cleaning. Not sure if there's fucktoy with a solution.

[–] Rhaedas@fedia.io 5 points 1 day ago

It's funny how talk about vibrators gets both humor and acceptance as normal for women, but discussing a male counterpart is both embarrassing and made fun of, even though it is a critical health issue as men get older, and especially if there is less to no sex going on.

[–] Assassassin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Top rack of the dish washer, obviously

[–] atro_city@fedia.io 2 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

Spread the cum on all the dishes. Genius.

[–] Assassassin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 21 hours ago

It's the opposite of a non-stick coating

[–] lotharmatthaeus@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 day ago

There are some that can be opened along the long side of the tube, so they are really easy to clean.

This style masturbator is by far the best I have used. Easy to hold even when slippery, easy to clean, and very inexpensive. There is a nicer, four-finger version that I own, but this one from Amazon is probably similar.

https://a.co/d/095d8ytr

[–] Assassassin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 1 day ago

Seconded for tenga, you can get them for like $20 on Amazon.

[–] socsa@piefed.social -2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

My brother in Christ, you have described a shop-vac.

[–] Krusty@quokk.au 0 points 1 day ago

That's a girthy shop vac. He might need a 2 meter hose extension.