Funny

I'm 50 and my occupational therapist just ordered me a $571 (fully covered by healthcare benefits) side-sleeping shoulder freedom pillow. Am a very happy girl.

Amateur! Wait till you hit 65. I'm slowly becoming Darth Vader. Machines to make me breathe, eyes that can't see, ears that can't hear and teeth that shatter on the softest food. Luckily they haven't started replacing any of the inside bits.... yet.

PS: this is just the short list of stuff.

Idk man, I'm 35 and I just go to bed

I feel like my body wants to stay up for 30 hours followed by 14 hours of sleep.
I need a different planet.

After 40? Lmfao. People, just take the time to care for yourself. Eat balanced meals, don’t over eat, stop watching TV all the time and go for a walk.

Take it from someone nearing 50 who took gluttony to the max by 35. I feel better today, than I ever did in my younger adult years because I stopped being a typical american.

40+ here and the only reason why I don't sometimes sleep well is because I chose to play games until 2am.

I'm 36 and I wear a CPAP because my body tries to stop breathing otherwise.

Ooh boy just you wait til you realize you're just napping in between having to wake up to piss 3 times in the night.

I am at the stage where I either sleep 4 hours or sleep 12 hours

Yea my sleep schedule is destroyed

I’m 39 and I need standard bed setup, or a couch with the tv blaring.

I am 43 and all I need is a couple of glasses of whiskey...

Just sleep on that futon again for a month. You will sleep like a baby when you sleep in bed again.

I've officially reached a stage of middle age where my spouse and I stopped sharing a bed. I do sleep with my dog though, who is very snuggly.

I sleep well as long as my wife is there. She can roll us from one side of the bed to the other or off it even and I'll continue sleeping like a rock. The moment she's sick or has trouble sleeping is when I also have trouble sleeping, which is fine with me.

I do sometimes miss being younger and sleeping any where, any time though.

At this point I'm considering a colostomy bag so I don't have to go to the bathroom 5 times during the night 

I've been hit by 7 cars. What is your excuse?

Is "a fan" here a person who stands next to your sleeping body in the dark and watches you? In that case I don't want one.

I sleep in the pod of goo that Neo left, it's alright

at 35 I need the ear plugs, the right temperature, to feel clean, the eye mask if there's any light source at all, and to lay on my left side with a 7cm thick pillow at just the right angle so my head rests without touching the occipital area

I can feel myself dying

So my only major issue is my normal brand of shoes changed thier foot bed insert and it wholly fucked up my back and knee after a week.

I thought I just needed to break them in, I've had to buy a new pair of shoes that don't maim me instead now, which is a new experience at 38.

Pretty much my wife since 35. Good news is she no longer gets mad at me for sleeping like a rock with little effort.

In my 20s and made a sleep pb recently. 16hrs continuous

But have you tried 3 or 4 beers?

Best thing for sleep was a CPAP (in my case anyways). I can make a cocoon with blankets and even cover my head since I can breathe via the machine. Best I've ever slept.

That much melatonin will give you weird sweat nightmares. I just mention this because a lot of people think more mg = more sleep but at 10+ mg melatonin does real weird shit to your REM cycle. Most evidence shows that the optimal dose is often less than 1 mg. Just in case you're curious.