Kemically Fried Children
Dead Lobster
Pizza Slut
Windoze
this post was submitted on 23 Dec 2025
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facefuck.
"Esos hijos de puta" /s
Almost all of them are in spanish, since it's my first language...
- Steve Jobs -> Esteban Trabajos
- Bill Gates -> Recibo Puertas
- Mark Zuckerberg -> Mark Zuckerbergas
- Elon Musk -> Elon Cucks
- Nintendo -> Nientiendo
- YouTube -> Tu Tubo
- Facebook -> Cara Libro
- Tiktok -> Tique Toque
- Microsoft -> Mocosoft
- Toyota -> Totoya
- SQL Server -> Ese culiao Server
- Coca-Cola -> Caca-Culo
- Pepsi -> Pepno
- Dr. Pepper -> Dr. Pooper
This will be open to edit to add more.
Muy Buenos todos pero perdón por ser "ese" usuario. Bill Gates es técnicamente Facturo Cercas
Pepsi -> Pepno
Okay, that one got me.
I love getting insight into how people mess with language in other languages.
Windows, with it's numerable AI and cloud integrations, has morphed itself into a "Sloperating System" and I refuse to call it anything else.
Still refer to stop and shop as stop and pee sometimes. Its a callback to an old joke from when I was little. The joke was that the 2 grocery stores in town, stop & shop, and A&P were going to merge.
Whole foods -> Whole paycheck
We used to call it whole booze. Because for some foolish reason, the one in our colege town used to put giant displays of wine (like a full wall of cases of the cheap stuff) in the automatic door vestibule.
So it was pretty common to see a car zoom up, and a couple kids jump out, grab a couple cases and then peel out driving off.
Windoof
? doof?
doof = stupid in German
The classic Ford -> Fix Or Repair Daily
My favorite is
Found
On
Road
Dead
Fucked
Over
Rebuilt
Dodge
Tesla --> Swasticars
I like this one. The memes coming out of his Nazi salute were pretty good.
X = xitter, said “shitter”
I say Twitter because Elon deadnames his children so I will deadname his platform.
Someone is trying to take over the twitter name to start a new platform: https://www.twitter.new/
I want to see Elon lose the Twitter name and be stuck with X. It's going to be so much fun watching that happen.
Or Twitter users: Twits.
Oh, I use "Twatter".
It has been the toiletbowl of the world for years. Never was a "townsquare".
Lol a trucking company I worked for in high school was called "Cheezik Transport" or something like that but all the workers called it "Cheese Dick"
Citrix -> Shitrix
Yes, I've had the displeasure. Good one.
Burger King -> Booger Fling
Home Despot
Not companies, but "N*STINK, Backstreet Girls, and 98 Disease" lives rent free in my brain.
Please tell me that the Backstreet Girls exist now as a badass parody/cover band.
If Wikipedia is to be believed, the Backstreet Girls are a Norwegian rock band formed in 1984. Which means they predate the Backstreet Boys by a long time.
But I have to take Wikipedia at its word, since most sources are in Norwegian.
EA has been either Electronic Farts or Evil Assholes since middle school, for me.
there is truly no higher art than replacing "art" or "heart" with "fart"
You mean there is truly no higher fart?
you are a true fartist
I truly suffer for my fart.
...especially after eating too much dairy.
For years my grub entry read rWindows, it doesn't make sense in English, but "Ruim" is portuguese for bad, so it sounds similar to badows.
I found some for Apple. They aren't all "pejorative" but still
- Fruit Company (or Fruit Store)
- i.... --> iSheep, iOverprice, iGreed, iLies, iRot
- Apfel von Braun (Apple sucks up to fascists and authoritarians, Hiterl's wife was Eva Braun, Apfel = Apple in German)
- Malus - Latin name for Apple
Bookface. It's not even that clever it just stuck with me for some random ass reason.
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Cannondale -> Crack'n'fail
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