That man's name, Christopher Columbus
this post was submitted on 21 Nov 2025
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I am confused how they are just throwing "Oh, and they were also charged with production of child pornography," in there as an afterthought....
Thank you! I was like “really burying the lede there”
Both men were also charged with the production of child pornography.
Very large deal as well.
Only reason this case got prosecuted.
Yeah I'm a bit confused on the details? Isn't it freedom of speech to plan it and talk about it but only convictable if they try to implement their plan? I'm a natural born US citizen, is it illegal to have fantasies? Also their plan is fucking gross and I don't condone it
All Nazis are pedos. Its kind of redundant.
So, uh, child abuse or fantasy?
World’s dumbest nonce just dropped
According to prosecutors, the men, both of whom live in the Dallas area, began masterminding their bizarre plan in August 2024.
Their alleged goal was to take over Gonave — a tropical island of about 100,000 people located roughly 30 miles from Port-au-Prince — in order to carry out “rape fantasies.”
The plot involved buying a sailboat, weapons and ammunition and recruiting homeless people in the Washington, D.C. metropolitan area “to serve as a mercenary force.”
“Mastermind” is definitely a bit of a stretch. One sailboat and a gaggle of homeless men against 100,000 people? ROFL.
I suppose that plan makes it pretty clear they thought white supremacy was not only a thing, but something tangible. Like, somehow it would all work out despite the overwhelming disadvantage because they are "inherently better", so it'll be easy.
Even asgardians invading midgard would hesitate at that number difference.
Their mistake other than the child pornography was that they didn't just label this as the script for The Expendable5.
As punishment, let the Haitians know and send him on a one way ticket to let him try.
I've had the privilege of knowing and working with a few Haitian nationals in my lifetime and let me tell you, those guys do NOT fuck around. I can GUARANTEE it would not end well for those two assholes.
Them and Jamaicans are two Caribbean countries whose locals are badly underestimated for their capability of violence.
They went to war with France and won. If I didn't know anything else about Haiti, that would have been enough.
Well, I think we should still give them a chance, one clean pair of underwear, and a flare.
send them to adaman islands.
It's not 'bizarre,' it's an historical reenactment!
Incel plans be like… I’m going to be a real life conqueefador
How American of them.
I believe this was the French.
The only difference between people like this and the leaders of the Nazi movement is that the Nazi movement got money, funding, support and acceptance by wealthy interests.
The difference between these nut jobs and authoritarian leaders of nations is the willingness of monied interests to support them in achieving their goals.
Kids, don’t do drugs.
Well, not those drugs, anyway.
Psycho's got those republican eyes
Yeah, dude on the left is a great example of being able to visually identify a psycho
Their alleged goal was to take over Gonave — a tropical island of about 100,000 people
The plot involved buying a sailboat, weapons and ammunition and recruiting homeless people in the Washington, D.C. metropolitan area “to serve as a mercenary force.”
Yeah... I don't think that's gonna work.
When I read the headline I assumed it'd be some flyspeck private island where most of the residents are listed as staff. But nope, they wanted to do a full on Columbus and slaughter around 50k people. Which of course, the world would definitely just ignore and just let Gonave become Murder Rape island.
I'm glad they have other charges, because this "plan" is so stupid and unworkable that It'll be hard to prove that it's not just some fucked up fantasy that they were larping.
If the UN and countries who have sent security forces in an attempt to control Haitian gangs have failed, why did these two racist dipshit think they were going to be successful in that scheme?
Their alleged goal was to take over Gonave — a tropical island of about 100,000 people located roughly 30 miles from Port-au-Prince — in order to carry out “rape fantasies.”
The plot involved buying a sailboat, weapons and ammunition and recruiting homeless people in the Washington, D.C. metropolitan area “to serve as a mercenary force.”
Once reaching the shore, they intended to stage a coup d’etat, murder every man on the island and force the women and children there into sex slavery, prosecutors said.
They allegedly took numerous steps to make their grandiose scheme a reality, including learning Creole, the dominant language in Haiti. Thomas even went as far as enlisting in the Air Force to obtain the necessary military skills.
Both men were also charged with the production of child pornography.
Jfc
Ah yes, the "columbus gambit". Let's see how it works out for them.
I’m gonna float a raft down to North Texas from New England. When I get there, Ima gon’ get myself an EBike, then ride around their neighborhood blasting some vintage Whitesnake tunes from a large bluetooth speaker, intermixed with an airhorn when they get to yelling.
Don't worry, Trump will bail him out and probably give him a job with the Coast Guard leadership.
I think they should have stuck them on a boat a let them try it. We could all have a laugh when they get their asses stomped into the dirt.
And letting innocents get hurt? Think a bit.
Why is this illegal? I know ... weird question, but ... they didn't do it.
I am admitting right now in public that I am going to build a spaceship and enslave an alien planet. What are my charges?
They were charged with conspiracy to murder, maim, or kidnap in a foreign country and production of child pornography.
Emphasis mine.
An alien planet isn't a foreign country. It's not clear that aliens are legal persons. You don't seem to be engaged in a conspiracy either. I'm not a lawyer on Earth nor Glaxtonbry but: I don't think it's illegal to advance your plan.
Yes, but there is no difference between a foreign country and another planet in this case. The "home" country does not have jurisdiction.
The child porn does actually leave an opening. If they were organizing a "trip" for the purpose of abuse then most countries can take jurisdiction and act (it happens alot).
However, conspiracy charges for planning an attack in another country would likely get dismissed and at worst would be used for forfeiture... to sieze any materials and goods.
I think the law they broke is "conspiracy to commit murder, maim, or kidnap in a foreign country". The conspiracy is the crime and the home country does have jurisdiction because the conspiracy is happening there and they have a law against conspiring to murder people in other countries.
It looks like they took steps to realize their plan which takes it from random nonsense to actual conspiracy.
Conspiracy requires the agreement to commit a crime within a specific jurisdiction where it is illegal.
"Some island somewhere" lacks jurisdiction.
Where did you hear that?
This is enough internet for me today.
The whole thing had me but the army of homeless men was the over the top part for me. Like how you gonna motivate them? Loose change?
Bring back the military filibuster and make it modern this guy thought .