Cheeseweed Flapwort sounds like a hobbit name
this post was submitted on 21 Nov 2025
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I take exception to this.
This would be funnier if you hadn't created the account just to post this.
Just wait for the repost!
I always play the long game.
I'm sorry, but "Lavender" is not a good name.
I feel like Mother of Thousands is maybe not the best name for a baby.
Shub-Niggurath, The Black Goat of the Woods with a Thousand Young, get my vote.
How about the classic Wandering Jew?
I grow those! Now I have no idea what the PC name for them is. (Which is weird because the Wandering Jew is basically mythology, nothing against Jews.)
The name has, for good reasons, fallen out of fashion. "Inch plant" is what I've heard recently.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wandering_Jew
Various types of plants are called by the common name "wandering Jew", apparently because of these plants' ability to resist gardener's attempt to prevent them from "wandering over the earth until the second coming of Christ" (see Wandering Jew (disambiguation) § Plants). In 2016, to avoid anti-Semitism, the name "wandering dude" to describe Tradescantia has been proposed in an online plant community by Pedram Navid, instead of "Wandering Jew" and "silver inch plant".[83] [84][85][86]
Well I guess you don't expect your kids to be high achievers...
I think that's a title one earns, not one that should be given from birth.
So are dragonhunter and hellbender ... and screaming armadillo
Yeah that's a title reserved for animal shelter's owner.
Honestly, Hellbender is badass
Bender would be too
Or even Hell
Sarcastic Fringehead and Pacific Spiny Lumpsucker, go clean your rooms! And stop teasing your little sister Common Cockchafer.
Ima go with Cawwwwww
My baby will be called Compressed Flapworth and no woke liberal snowflake will stop me!
Do you want to bring them over to have a play date with my sweet virgins creeper?
Cheeseweed would probably be the coolest kid in school, ngl.
I was just thinking that it sounds like an insult.
"Of course it was loaded you cheeseweed!"
Don't know why they mock my little Cheeseweed Jr.
There really is a screaming hairy armadillo (Chaetophractus vellerosus). The name comes from its squealing when you pick it up.
That name seems a little weirder in context.
It's like calling a species of wild pig the "Bleeding Black Hog" because of how it reacts to being shot.
There is that meme floating around about a salmon learning that named a color after them. I'm sure there are a ton of other examples.
Great, you've made my son cry. Now I'll have to make pancakes in the morning for Tufted Titmouse.
He just needs a hug from his mother, Great Tit.
Capiche?
Good enough for a poke
Greatest: Boa, A Lizard Bird, Mealybug Destroyer, Raven.
Hawk, Badger