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Trump Confirms “He Will Win” UFC Fight at White House, Confirms Pay per View (ttrpg.network)

submitted 1 day ago by bradorsomething@ttrpg.network to c/theonion@midwest.social

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(Washington DC) In a statement Friday, donald trump confirmed he will win the UFC fight planned to be held in the White House: “well of course I will win, and america wins,” trump told reporters as the rose garden was being paved. “I can’t spoil everything, although I can, and there is a chair and it will be really something, there will be blood and maybe Ivanka, it will be really something.” Trump then ‘pantomimed’ choking a Fox news reporter, who was later hospitalized with bruises to his neck.

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[–] braydan@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago

I ate the onion, assumed it was going to be trump vs jake paul

[–] hellfire103@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 day ago

**cromch** mmm.... onions...