this post was submitted on 04 Jul 2025
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Unpopular Opinion

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I'm not sure how or why grape became the default. For the longest time, I thought I didn't like PB&J. But ever since trying it with strawberry instead, I understood the appeal. It's so much better, and now I find it weird that the combination isn't more common.

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[–] slingstone@lemmy.world 2 points 1 hour ago

Every jam or jelly I've tried works. Strawberry and blackberry are my favorites.

I canned some peach jam recently, and it was pretty good, too.

[–] BurgerBaron@piefed.social 1 points 2 hours ago

I've never noticed grape being default. Maybe it's regional? Restaurants here still have the carousels with a variety of jams if you order toast.

But yeah you're right. I think Raspberry is also top tier, and my own Evan's Cherry tree jam I make.

[–] Bytemeister@lemmy.world 6 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

Both of those are meh-tier options. You want seedless blackberry or orange marmalade.

[–] BigBananaDealer@lemmy.world 1 points 2 hours ago

those are for special occasions

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 4 hours ago

Meet me out back after school. We're gonna have words.

[–] AngryishHumanoid@lemmy.world 5 points 6 hours ago

Ahem: grape jelly is the default because it's cheaper to make and has a stronger flavor, therefore you need less of it as an ingredient. Having said that strawberry jam for the win.

[–] rockandsock@lemmy.world 1 points 4 hours ago

Strawberry has been the default for PB&J in my family for decades. Glad the 1980s has finally caught up to you.

[–] southernbrewer@lemmy.world 4 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

No one's mentioned blackcurrant jam? The absolute best kind of jam for all purposes including PBJ

Never heard of grape jam or 'jelly' though. Strawberry or raspberry jam seems to be the most common round here in NZ, and it's all okay but has nothing on blackcurrant

[–] elephantium@lemmy.world 2 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

blackcurrant

I gotta try this.

Have you never heard the difference between jam and jelly? It's a real distinction. Jelly is basically jam with any pieces of the actual fruit filtered out for a smoother consistency.

[–] southernbrewer@lemmy.world 1 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 3 hours ago)

Yeah I'm vaguely aware that jelly exists. Not sure if I've ever had it though, I think I've seen it on a shelf once or twice but it's definitely pretty uncommon here. It might be mostly a US thing

Round here 'jelly' refers to a wobbly hydrated crystal that kids eat with icecream at parties

[–] Doubleohdonut@lemmy.ca 17 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

Raspberry jam (jam>jelly) is my perfect go to, but I have never even been presented with grape on peanut butter as an option. Strawberry is the way I've always seen this presented. Is grape regional?

[–] Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world 3 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

It might be. I'm in the US, and it seems to be the default here.

[–] Winthrowe@lemmy.ca 12 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

Grape is a default in the US for historical reasons, that’s what was in the WWII ration packs, and inertia carried it from there.

[–] accideath@feddit.org 5 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

Generally. I hear so much about grape flavoured this and grape flavoured that from US-based media. Anything that goes beyond grape juice is a rarity here in Germany. A lot of what would be grape flavoured in the US is black currant flavoured here.

My goto jam for pbnj is apricot though. Can highly recommend.

[–] Doubleohdonut@lemmy.ca 3 points 7 hours ago

Holy crap German jam aisles were delightful when I was last there! There are SO many interesting flavours, all PACKED with actual fruit and seeds ❤️

[–] DeceasedPassenger@lemmy.world 4 points 8 hours ago (2 children)

I'll do you one better and share my preference of raspberry jelly which is superior above all, imo. Not a fan of grapes myself. Strawberry can be nice, but some of the jam products can be underprocessed in a way that creates a slimy unpleasant texture... never a problem with raspberry jelly. Boysenberry is also pretty great. Get out there and discover!

[–] elephantium@lemmy.world 2 points 6 hours ago

Raspberry. There's only one man who would dare give me the raspberry!

[–] Obi@sopuli.xyz 2 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago)

Yes, I'm a European who's been enlightened about PB&J by my Canadian partner but I too much prefer it with Raspberry jam. Or what we call "fruits of the forest", also red fruits.

I tried it with an apricot/passion fruit one the other day and it was surprisingly nice. We don't really have grape jam here afaik.

Our PB is also a bit different though, it's literally just crushed peanuts (100% ingredient).

[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 9 points 10 hours ago (2 children)

Ooooooo, damn! Homie in here looking to fight! Absolutely brilliant unpopular opinion; simple, direct, and easy to discuss.

Aight, I gotta say up front that I am picky about strawberries in general, and it is rare for preserves or jams (I've never had a strawberry jelly, but I'm not that kind of asshole to insist that a pb&j can only use jelly) to meet my standards.

I disagree with strawberry anything being better than grape jams or jellies on two standards. First is that food preferences are always subjective, and thus we can only rarely say anything other than "better for me"

The second is essentially subjective as well, as it goes to those preferences that I have.

A pb&j is on my list of perfect sandwiches (again, for me, but I think it would fit such a description in general) because it provides a balance of sweet, savory, salty, acidic and allows nigh infinite variety with fruit flavors. You can have one and need nothing else to satisfy one's palate.

I think where grape is better than strawberry for those that prefer it is the nature of grape. It is a fairly strong flavor, but also usually simpler in jelly or jam form. The processing of grapes in that way means the potential complexity of flavor grapes can have is subdued. As such, it delivers the balance to the peanut butter in a very accessible way. Remember, we often encounter pb&j sandwiches first in our youth when we haven't developed our palate as much, and often can't appreciate more subtle flavours or more complex ones.

Strawberry jams and preserves are almost always more complex in flavor than grape versions (though I'd argue that a good homemade muscadine jelly belies that). They're also a tad more acidic, and strawberry flavor as it differs from other fruits is bolder as well. So it often stands over the peanut butter, even to the degree of smothering at times.

I believe that's why, ignoring personal preferences, grape became the default and is "better" than strawberry as a default. I might also argue that apple jelly is better than grape as a default for the same reasons; the varieties of apple used combined with the jelly making process make it an incredible pb&j candidate.

I put way too much thought into sandwich theory. I admit that with joy in my heart lol.

But I have tried essentially every kind of jam and jelly that I've run into over the years on a pb&j, as well as adjacent options like apple butter. I maintain that the holy trinity of apple, grape and strawberry should be default. If you open a sandwich stand, one of those three should be what you serve if someone asks for a pb&j without specifying a flavor.

While I prefer apple as my personal default, I think that the hypothetical sandwich shop should likely default to grape as it is the assumption most people make when they ask for one, but I wouldn't be mad at any of them as default.

Now, because I'm picky, strawberry is my third or fourth choice when I'm wanting one. Apple or grape is going to be what I reach for 80% of the time. Damson plum is roughly tied with strawberry for me, and I can never decide which I prefer.

What is straight out is any fruit like blackberry that has the seeds still in the jam or preserves (by definition, seeds can't be present in jellies). It just isn't pleasant to run into those hard bits (as opposed to something crunchy like crunchy pb, or some nice potato chips layered into the sandwich, though that's not a pure pb&j), so they can fuck right off.

I am otherwise very open to fruits in that regard. Even oddball things like pepper jelly, or watermelon rind preserves are worthy on rare occasions. Watermelon rind preserves, btw, are exactly what you might think. The peeled and cut rind of a watermelon preserved by a combination of citrus (lemon), sugar, and heat. Pectin may be added to adjust the thickness as preferred. It is amazeballs, and can go with damn near anything that can handle the sweetness. If you've never had it, find an old southern granny or gramps and die happy after they share a jar with you.

Even things that don't do well as preserves or jams can be given honorary place on a pb&j sandwich. Bruléed banana as an example. Little pinch of cinnamon, a sprinkle of sugar, bake for maybe ten minutes then brule to caramel. Lay that on the waiting pb&bread, then die happy. It isn't a proper pb&J, but it's a spiritual cousin to it.

[–] MyTurtleSwimsUpsideDown@fedia.io 5 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

Great post! Thank you for all that effort

I’ve had pickled watermelon rind before 👌.
I might have to keep some rind next time I have watermelon to make preserves.

[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 2 points 7 hours ago

The pickled and preserved are like two glorious sides of a coin.

And they go great together.

[–] Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world 4 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

I love your detailed take on this! You sound like a pb&J connoisseur and I am honored to have received some of your wisdom. I know a nice local place where I can get some locally-made apple butter, so I know what I'll be trying next.

[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 2 points 7 hours ago

Oh man! Those small producers almost always knock it out of the park.

[–] riskable@programming.dev 1 points 6 hours ago

For maximum deliciousness use strawberry jam and vanilla peanut butter. As in, the peanut butter has some vanilla flavoring added.

[–] SandLight@lemmy.world 10 points 12 hours ago (2 children)

I like peanut butter with strawberry rhubarb. The extra tartness really brings it for me.

[–] andros_rex@lemmy.world 5 points 11 hours ago

Trader Joe’s has this strawberry rhubarb soda, and it is divine.

[–] Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world 3 points 12 hours ago

Oooh, I wouldn't have thought about that. I'm gonna have to try it.

[–] rescue_toaster@lemmy.zip 3 points 9 hours ago

I was cycling through a bunch of different jams and preserves for a bit. Apricot preserves ended up being my favorite and is my default now. Strawberry is really low on my personal preference list, well below grape.

I have a food processor - making peanut butter from peanuts is so simple.

[–] wjrii@lemmy.world 4 points 10 hours ago

First off, I actually agree with you that strawberry is better, though for strawberry I usually use jam or preserves. I do like grape jelly fine though.

Second, I’ll use this opportunity to describe the best way to make a PB&J. You need three pieces of bread and a toaster. Toast one and only one piece of bread. PB goes on the untoasted, and J on both sides of the toast, which now goes in the middle. Adds texture without altering the flavor profile or making it even messier like potato chips, and it improves the bread-to-filling ratio. Using PB-only on the untoasted slices also makes for a moisture barrier to keep the J from soaking through.

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 4 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

I don't want any trouble, but I disagree.

[–] Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world 4 points 12 hours ago

Well yeah. This is Unpopular Opinion. We're expected to disagree.

[–] CM400@lemmy.world 3 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

M&Ms did a promotional thing for one of the transformers movies, it was “strawberried peanut butter” and it was fantastic.

[–] MyTurtleSwimsUpsideDown@fedia.io 3 points 10 hours ago

They’ve got PB&J peanut butter m&ms out now. I forget where, but I got a carton a couple weeks ago.

[–] guillem@aussie.zone 4 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

Strawberry jelly with cocoa spread is better than strawberry jelly with peanut butter ._.

[–] Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world 4 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

I was hoping this post would bring new combination ideas. Do you have a particular cocoa spread you like to use?

[–] guillem@aussie.zone 4 points 12 hours ago

When it comes to toast I'm not picky, the supermarket's brand is good enough.

[–] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 1 points 9 hours ago

Strawberry jam, agreed. It doesn't slither away like jelly. And if it's a packed lunch, put a thin swipe of butter on the bread first to stop the jam from soaking through.

Coarse ground peanut butter but not crunchy, with a little salt and honey, plus blackberry or boysenberry preserves is the way. That or a fluffernutter.

[–] Acidbath@lemmy.world 1 points 10 hours ago* (last edited 10 hours ago) (1 children)

Okay but what type of peanut butter are we talking about? I dunno about the peeps here but I never got along with anyone who worships smooth pb. Those guys are actually insane.

[–] elephantium@lemmy.world 2 points 6 hours ago

Smooth on spreads cleanly on toast. Crunchy PB makes it really hard to spread jam or especially jelly on the toast without just dropping giant gobs of it.