this post was submitted on 19 Jun 2025
390 points (98.3% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

32885 readers
3665 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 29 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] kmartburrito@lemmy.world 76 points 2 weeks ago

I can't risk power tools damaging the internal cylinder

[–] Venus_Ziegenfalle@feddit.org 27 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

On a semi related note does anyone have instructions on how to remove an Ice Age Manny the mammoth toy ball from a small cylinder?

[–] TheKracken@lemmy.world 17 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Pacattack57@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

CRANK THAT HOGG

[–] hoss@lemmynsfw.com 5 points 2 weeks ago
[–] TheImpressiveX@lemmy.today 26 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.today 9 points 2 weeks ago

M(ario)PREG

[–] LookBehindYouNowAndThen@lemmy.world 24 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

You could try getting a little screwdriver between the cylinder and the walls of the snout? It may be that relieving the suction will facilitate it's removal.

Then put some balls in it, that's what belongs there.

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago

Do you put the balls in the condom first or...?

[–] JaymesRS@literature.cafe 21 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

You can use it to pay a medieval plague doctor that will give you leech therapy. They will need to place the leeches at the base of your cylinder as well as any free hanging olive shaped objects attached to the cylinder to shrink it so your homemade fleshlight falls off-I mean so the m&m tube- I mean the Manny the mammoth toy falls off your dick-I mean ohhhh you touch my tra-la-la

[–] ProfessorProteus@lemmy.world 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

ohhhh you touch my tra-la-la

Mmmm, my ding ding dong

[–] dalekcaan@lemm.ee 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

🎵La, la la la, la la la, la la la la la la🎶

[–] ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 weeks ago

The collective age of this comment chain is now approximately 120.

[–] lime@feddit.nu 12 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

it's got a trigger, don't it? yeet that meat

[–] Aggravationstation@feddit.uk 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

If you don't yeet your meat, you can't have any pudding

[–] bampop@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

HOOOOW can you have any pudding, if you don't yeet yer meat?

[–] WhyIHateTheInternet@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

You're going to fuck that mammoth snout, aren't you?

[–] __Lost__@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 2 weeks ago

I think this ship has already sailed

[–] Sabata11792@ani.social 7 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Less shameful than the M&Ms I guess.

[–] devilish666@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago
[–] Baguette@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

According to the internet, if its broken it either needs duct tape, wd 40, or percussive maintenance

[–] YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.today 4 points 2 weeks ago

None of these are an option in this specific scenario.

[–] socsa@piefed.social 5 points 2 weeks ago

How small are we talking?

[–] Lemmyoutofhere@lemmy.ca 5 points 2 weeks ago

Turn on the vibrator.

[–] wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 2 weeks ago

Got that DSN (dick sucking nostril)

[–] Outwit1294@lemmy.today 3 points 2 weeks ago

Make it squirt

[–] someguy3@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

You just need something to attach to the cylinder.

[–] Honytawk@feddit.nl 1 points 1 week ago
[–] ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago

Translation: "I tried to fuck this toy, and my dick is stuck in it."