Inspired by this post about Vampire The Masquerade
this post was submitted on 12 Feb 2026
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They lost me at the last point tbh. I don't blame anyone for not knowing and you shouldn't blame me for not learning about something that hasn't affected me.
I believe what they are referring to is that it's not any individuals responsibility to ensure that any other individuals knowledge of their marginalization is complete. That's not saying that individuals can't do it, nor that they shouldn't call attention to specific issues as effect them at that time. It's saying that they are not responsible to do the work of teaching someone that which they should learn themselves once the issue has been raised. To do otherwise often feels like the person has to justify their existence and struggles to anyone who asks. That's an unreasonable load for the marginalized person to carry.
So not blame, just where the burthen of learning falls once an issue comes up.
I wholly don't understand it. If one brings up an issue it kind of is up to the person to explain why it is an issue, no? I'd just tell ya I'm part of a marginalised group? Like, I'm the US version of "white", rich enough to afford a vacation a year and a house, cishet. My marginalization is not brought up on those bullet points so you'd have to go digging down my comments to find it. Like, how often do these issues get brought up?
Like, the person exists allright if they're in front of me but if they have an active problem they do have to make a case among the group, as otherwise it seems very easily weaponized.
As for the reason I'm a marginalised group, I got falsely accused of raping someone and that wholly destroyed my social life. I hope you have an understanding of why I'm very weary of these kind of systems.
What this is talking about would be if I were to now ask you questions about your marginalization and demanded answers. But since that is not relevant to our discussion here and because it's not your job to ensure that I am informed on any issues relating to your marginalization I wouldn't ask the questions in the first place. You shouldn't have to feel like you have to justify your existence to anybody who possess by and is curious.
People sometimes treat visible members of marginalized groups like they are information dispensers. That just because they are viable they are responsible for entertaining their curiousity. In specific instances where it's relevant and invited a discussion of their marginalization is fine. But it's is not the job of someone to ensure any person interested is told about whatever they want to ask.
It's your responsibility to learn, not their responsibility to teach.
It's not their responsibility to teach but it's also not my responsibility to keep abreast of all social developments. It's inappropriate to gatekeep due to someone's naive ignorance.
Picture this. Sitting at a table game and someone drops a term or phrase that I don't recognise. Am I going to run to the toilet and google that term? Or am I just gonna say 'yo, what's that mean?"
There's a world of difference between hearing a term you're not familiar with and saying something like, "I've never heard that before, would you mind telling me what it means?" and learning about someone's marginalization and asking them a bunch of questions about it. I'm guessing this rule is targeting the latter.
Personally, if I meet someone who is marginalized, I avoid talking about their marginalization unless they bring it up and are clearly interested in talking about it. If they don't want to be defined by it or be asked a bunch of questions about it, then that's their right.
How on earth did you stumble across a comment that is 5 days old?
No objection with your framing. In fact, I tend to agree. My disagreement was the narrow / binary lens applied by the previous commentor. Their perspective ('your responsibility to learn') is/was an extremely dismissive approach.
I'm only subscribed to like three communities so I see a lot of the same posts when I sort by subscribed.
We both agree that it's not all or nothing. It's unreasonable to say that asking a good faith question is always bad, just like it's unreasonable to demand someone answer questions about their marginalization. I was just pitching in my thoughts as to where the line is.
Hmm, yeah.
This shit that you're doing, right here? Nobody wants to deal with that.
also, found this from a tumblr post
Not everyone is an activist though. And even those that are, they need down time sometimes. I get it's tough for those on the spectrum to understand, but in this context, let people at the table just play the fucking game.
Yeah I'm not reading all that. Google it.
We're talking about a fucking game, not an undergraduate ethics class.