this post was submitted on 02 Jan 2026
910 points (98.7% liked)
Not The Onion
19201 readers
1257 users here now
Welcome
We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!
The Rules
Posts must be:
- Links to news stories from...
- ...credible sources, with...
- ...their original headlines, that...
- ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”
Please also avoid duplicates.
Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.
And that’s basically it!
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
There's that word 'hope' again. It seems to be the main driving force behind a.i. implementation.
Also, I think "cognitive real-time amplifier product" makes for a better acronym.
I've never heard Satya Nadella say a single thing that wasn't just buzzword garbage. He's like a human slop-generating machine. Maybe that's why he can't recognize AI slop when he sees it.
Given that he talks like an LLM trained exclusively on MBA bullshit, he’s only adding to the problem.
Talk about putting the cart before the fucking horse.
Calling them “cognitive amplifier tools” doesn’t make them “cognitive amplifier tools”. They’ve yet to show that they do anything of the sort.
Spitting out some basic code that probably has to be edited anyway is not a “cognitive amplifier tool”.
Generating smooth skinned avatars with questionable anatomy is not a “cognitive amplifier tool”.
Writing creepy, repetitive prose is not a “cognitive amplifier tool”.
Hell, the term “cognitive amplifier tool” is just nonsense anyway. For fuck’s sake, I hate these people.
the term spells out "crap"
That term really creeped me out. It's so cringey to a point that it scares me. Delusional asshole.
He probably had copilot write his speech for him. As a CEO he is naturally self centered and is projecting his own lack of ability onto everyone else.
They hope that's what they'll become. Spoiler: they won't. You amplify your cognition by using it, not relegating it to a dumb computer.
They don't even need to do that. They just need the general population to believe that they're "cognitive amplifier tools". If you say something enough times, eventually people will start believing it even if it isn't true.
"Hope is the worst of evils, for it prolongs the torment of man." - Friedrich Nietzsche
Dude's gonna be disappointed when it's still called slop because people recognize it as slop
Huh, it's for some reason put
against.itas a URL in your message - which it turns out it's a valid URL... But costs £4000/year to buyWhy do they think CEO speak will convince us of anything. They have lost all touch
The "hope" is that they will make shitloads of money from gullible dipshits buying their bullshit.
That's more of a bet, which is the other word I keep seeing used about a.i.'s financial prospects. More or less the same thing though, so yeah.
Explain the fundamental difference between "hope" and "bet".
Refer to the second sentence above. But I guess, with a bet, there's money involved. Hope doesn't specifically require that.
In other words, hope isn't necessarily a bet but a bet is always a hope. Which was my point.