this post was submitted on 28 Nov 2025
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Today I Learned

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[–] IonTempted@lemmynsfw.com 19 points 15 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago) (3 children)

I think toxic podcasts have a big influence on young men, especially those who grew up without strong father figures. My own dad wasn’t perfect (I joke a bit about it on my profile), and many of us went through that risky “2015 phase” of consuming unhealthy online content.

What many politicians and advocates on the left often overlook is that toxic masculinity isn’t solved by telling men to be “less masculine.” You can actually counter unhealthy masculinity with healthy masculinity. Instead of shaming men, we should be teaching a better version of manhood one that includes therapy, emotional intelligence, and being able to talk honestly about what’s going on inside.

As corny as it sounds there's a reason when there's a bad take by a misinformed feminist calling all men evil on twitter ganders a response like "This is why men turn right" and sure while that stuff doesn't work on me anymore, It's not 2015-2016 there's still some vulnerable people that unfortunately fall for it, does that mean though that the feminist is wrong in her views? Not really, but I'm not talking about myself I'm talking about a lot of men that do fall for it.

Most working-class men who grind through 9–5 jobs, going from shift to shift, are worried about affordability and stability. If someone comes along and says “I’m going to make your life easier,” that’s who they’ll vote for even if it’s Trump. You can call them naïve or say the leopards ate their face or whatever , but the reality is that many of these men are desperate for change. And they’ll keep voting for whoever promises that change. When society pushes these men aside or dismisses them, some end up looking for someone to blame. That’s when you get people saying, “Women are the reason my life is hard,” or “Jews control everything.”

Of course, some people are genuinely racist or sexist, and there will always be trolls who just want attention. But why do those trolls exist in the first place? Often it’s because they feel insignificant, and attaching themselves to extreme movements gives them a sense of identity and purpose they don’t have otherwise.

[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 3 points 6 hours ago

jordan peterson, and joe roegan under putin played a big part in shoring up gop support in the usa, and then the other right wing talking heads. tate brothers is just a side benefit, which are borne out of the toxic pickup artist games.

[–] MajorasTerribleFate@lemmy.zip 8 points 12 hours ago* (last edited 12 hours ago) (1 children)

One of my favorite counter-arguments (so to speak) against Toxic Masculinity being the "true" masculinity is that it's based so much on toughing out emotions, denying them, not showing physical or emotional weakness, etc. Yet, this misses the incredible display of deep confidence and self-image that come from being able to display humility, compassion, and sadness without feeling like that's a risk to your "manliness".

If what defines someone as a man is based so heavily on what others think of them or code them as, they are actually saying other people control whether or not they are considered masculine/manly, which is not very Alpha Male of them.

On Parks and Recreation, Ron Swanson wins an award and teases Leslie Knope about it. She ends up saying to him, "That's not really the attitude I'd expect from an award winner." He responds, "Everything I do is the attitude of an award winner, because I have won an award." I feel like this can be adjusted for anyone self-identifying as "masculine", "feminine", or any other such thing - "Everything I do is inherently manly, because I am a man." (adjust as appropriate)

[–] driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br 6 points 10 hours ago

That last part reminds me of a 4chan (?) meme of the Chad saying that he knows that trans women are women because he's straight so everyone that he likes is a woman.

[–] orioler25@lemmy.world 5 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

Could you name a few books by "advocates on the left" that criticise masculinity but argue for less masculinity rather than a redefinition of masculinity?

[–] IonTempted@lemmynsfw.com 3 points 14 hours ago

To be honest with you I don't know a lot, and yeah I guess that's your point but I remember reading The will to change: men, masculinity, and love by beli hooks back in my 2015 phase and I don't remember a lot from it, but I think it made some good points.