this post was submitted on 19 Nov 2025
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[–] Fondots@lemmy.world 51 points 20 hours ago (5 children)

"locker room talk"

Most of my friends and I are pretty traditionally "manly" men. The kinds of guys you turn to if you need to build something, fix something, need to cut down a tree, want to drink beer and smoke cigars, shoot guns (not after drinking the beer,) go fishing (beer is ok for that,) etc.

I have basically no clue what's going on in any of their sex lives. We never really comment on women's appearances, and when we do it's kept to just a very quick observation, "man, she's hot" kind of thing.

Damn near any time some sort of sex talk comes up it's our female friends stoking the fires.

I'm pretty sure my wife and her friends talk more about sex in an afternoon than I have in my whole lifetime.

Maybe it's because we very rarely find ourselves in a locker room, most of aren't exactly the gym or team sports type.

[–] TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 1 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 1 hour ago)

it's projection.

projection of a undesirable thing onto the other group makes it justified for your group to do it, even though you know it's wrong.

hence why liars will tell you that everyone is lying all the time and anyone who doesn't lie is stupid/naive.

(my exes were liars)

[–] Flickerby@lemmy.zip 5 points 13 hours ago

This exactly. Good lord, women talk about sex in EXCRUCIATING detail apparently. My dude friends and I don't even really touch on the subject but I've specifically asked a couple of my close women friends about this and they talk about EVERYTHING. Like, size, shape, positions, times, noises, it was...enlightening. And uncomfortable. This is obviously anecdotal and could just be this one group of friends of mine are super open and horny, but they said it's pretty common.

[–] y0kai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 16 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

I hear the phrase "locker room talk" and I think of middle school and high school locker rooms, where a bunch of pubescent boys with raging hormones and undeveloped prefrontal cortices try to impress one another or otherwise fit in socially.

Most grow out of this, I think. But then, like you, I don't hang out in locker rooms anymore, as I am not forced to.

[–] Fondots@lemmy.world 3 points 14 hours ago

Honestly, even when I was in middle and high school (so we're going back around 20 years now) I don't remember a whole lot of that

The main topics of conversation I remember were sports, video games, music, movies, TV, weed if you were a stoner, vacations, parties, and other plans you had and things you'd done recently, etc.

Pretty much the same shit I'd talk about now.

My personal experiences of course may not be representative of everyone, and like I said, it's been about 20 years so it's very possible my memory is faulty.

[–] FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca 5 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

It was actually a plot point on Friends once. Ross got upset that Rachel told Phoebe about his princess Leia sex fantasy. Ross and Chandler were surprised women talk to each other about sex.

[–] TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 2 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 1 hour ago)

most sitcom plot points are based in crude ignorant stereotypes that reinforce people's popular biases and don't require the audience to ever think, but be coddled by the familiar tropes they have grown up with.

if they challenged those lazy preconceptions people would not enjoy the show. like if you had a show with women were sex horn dogs and men were sensitive relationship seekers, it would not go over well with a general audience, unless it was a whacky comedy.

[–] DagwoodIII@piefed.social 6 points 19 hours ago

I agree.

Most of my jobs have been mostly male and I can count on one hand the number of guys I worked with who tried to chat up women while we were working.

In the locker room it was almost never about sex.