this post was submitted on 05 Nov 2025
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

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If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca 20 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

wait until this guy sits down to pee without paying attention to how things are hanging and feels it running down his calves

ask me how I know

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Doing bottom surgery entirely to pee consistently

[–] birdwing@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

negative brain: just stand and accept fate's golden stream pouring down your leg
small brain: pull skin and aim
normal brain: pee sitting down so you don't piss yourself
big brain: also watch how it's hanging
megabrain: cut off balls so you can see better how to aim
gigabrain: all out bottom surgery just so you can pee in peace

[–] BigBananaDealer@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I've sat down to relieve myself in the middle of the night while sick and half asleep and felt a strong warmth down the back of my legs because I pissed on myself through the gap under the toilet seat

I ain't afraid to admit it

[–] BigBananaDealer@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

ive done that a lot too. absolutely infuriating 😂

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

Yup, been there. Not fun.