this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2025
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me_irl
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Problem is, sometimes you feeling wrong either is wrong or is not noticed, so it's not always an issue until you point it out.
edit: Just words.
You can also just ask if it was wrong. Of course there are situations were it was wrong and the other person won't tell you or it wasn't wrong but then by asking you made it a only a bit weird. But at least the other person will know that you are unsure/bad with such situations instead of thinking you are an asshole or what else.
Well, that's kind of the point I was trying to make. I'm only speaking from personal experience, but sometimes I'll say something and fret over it obsessively, then talk to the other person and find out it was fine. In most cases, yes, we have that exchange and move on; but sometimes people will be like "actually, you know what? That was weird!" And get retroactively offended.
This is especially true if someone has social anxiety and constantly worries that they said the wrong thing. If I asked someone if I made a social mistake as often as I feel like I have, no one would ever stop thinking about my social ineptitude. My wife taught me this during one of our first few conversations.
I support open communication and don't mean to suggest that someone shouldn't apologize if they made a mistake or - universally - ask if they're unsure. Just that being aware of when to do so is another facet of interacting.