this post was submitted on 11 Jul 2025
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[–] RBWells@lemmy.world 23 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Y'all have some weird ideas about what a hobby is. Parenting as a hobby cracked me up, that's just having a family, you presumably grew up in one of those. Religion isn't a cult-like hobby, it's a hobby-ish cult.

On the parenting front though, I think those pageants are, those kids do it for a hobby and I would consider it abusive, and hard to exit once they are in.

[–] rob_t_firefly@lemmy.world 11 points 1 day ago (1 children)

those kids do it for a hobby

The pageants are the parents' hobby. The kids are whisked into it at a vulnerable stage of development in which they don't have the agency to decide any of it for themselves.

[–] RBWells@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago

I can agree with this. Like entering your dog in a dog show. I did want my kids in sport or dance as part of their education but told them if I ever gave criticism, to tell me to do the sport my own damn self. So they did their stuff as their hobbies, and I did my own art/sport stuff and kept out of theirs.

[–] philpo@feddit.org 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Nah, i must disagree here. The posters are right about being a hobby for some people. In two very bad ways

There are (usually the dads) who only pick it up once in a while the same way they go mountainbiking,etc. Then they usually try to "make up" what they didn't do the rest of the days and make it "extra fun". (As usual the Simpsons did a good take on it in their fun dad episode) But they don't give a rats ass the rest of the time. They don't go to the doctor with the kid,they don't know their school schedules,etc. They pick their hobby up maybe twice a month. I hate these people - because they are so numerous. When I am out with my kiddos I get comments "oh,do you babysit for your wife?" "Oh, it's nice you take that burden off your wife once in a while." Like what? Are you fucking crazy? My wife is the actual main income earner and this is not the 50ies.

The other kind is as bad,imho. The overinvolved ones. The ones that basically want to do everything so right that it becomes their hobby (or obsession). The "oh no, my kid can't eat sugar that is not made from XY" "I will not raise my child, i will love-raise them", etc. Note that while these have a crosssection with helicopter parents they are a distinct group themselves,as some prefer an intentional other style of parenting (all nature and free roaming,etc.). But they will focus on it - countless blogs, books from unqualified authors and instagram posts will be read, countless discussions, for them it becomes their hobby...or more.

So..there are some people who have parenting as a hobby. And that doesn't mean the ones who have no time for hobbies anymore - as parenting is fucking hard sometimes.

[–] Krudler@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

Yes, the feigned self-chuckle the other person had out-loud so the entire comment section could listen, is delusional bullshit.

MANY parents (and my sister is one) take parenting way beyond delivering the basic needs and rearing, and turn it into their entire personality. From the outside looking in, I can see a huge "mommy group" of women all in competition to assert who's child has the most afflictions, which mom's kid is the most autistic, which mom has the worst anxiety and needs the most free stuff and pity, who's got the rarest condishun....

Yeah, only a clueless dip would actually think this isn't a real thing. There are a shitload of parents who make parenting their whole life and identity. And they form mini-cults. My sister has been harming her own child since he was born because it gets her more social points in these groups. It's madness.