this post was submitted on 10 Apr 2025
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This is nursing, my 7th day of employment at a new unit. Coworker is in her early 60s on the fatter and smaller side, walks slowly, bouncing her whole body to left and right, is slow giving report, even though she has less patients than me and feels entitled not to deliver and pick up trays or drinks to patients, the whole 24 of them, looking for stuff to do at the computer when the time comes, conveniently sitting, while the rest of us do her effing job. Last time we had shift together I invited her to work with us, which she ignored.

I dread the day I have a shift alone with her with no helper. This unit seems to be perpetually understaffed: Normal seems to be 2 RN for the whole unit when there should be 3. If we’re lucky, we get a helper (not a RN).

On one hand I feel I should tolerate it because she is almost a senior and apparently is difficult for her to walk.

But this feelings of compassion disappear when I see her pretending to be busy while I’m moving patients, delivering trays, preparing drinks and sometimes feeding them. Her entitlement expecting I do her job no questioning it is what irks me the most. Employee me says escalate, make known this bothers me this much, but don’t know what an appropriate reaction to this looks like.

As said, I just started working there 7 days ago. She’s been at this unit much longer than me, which means management must know and tolerate this. Nursing is known for cliques.

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Coworker is in her early 60s on the fatter and smaller side, walks slowly, bouncing her whole body to left and right,

This stuff being the first thing that comes to your mind when you start talking about this coworker I think tells us more about you than it does about the coworker.

I'm also a bit curious how spry you imagine you're going to be when you're nearing retirement, I know a few nurses and former nurses, and one thing they all agree on is that it's a tough job and can be harder on the body than most people give it credit for. She's been in the trenches too, she's been doing what you're doing, probably longer than you have. She deserves some credit, some respect, and some empathy -- you're going to be there too, someday.

I don't know how the system works where you are, but in the systems I'm familiar with senior nurses, even ones who aren't RN, tend to have significant amounts of paperwork responsibilities and can be carrying serious consequences with what they put on that paperwork. I bet she does more paperwork than you do, and and that's a lot because I bet you have a lot too. Work is work, even if not all of it is physical. You say she's "pretending to be busy" but that's a common accusation against knowledge workers in fields that require a lot of critical thinking and organization. You have no idea what is going on in her brain at that moment, what responsibilities she's juggling and mentally organizing. That vacant stare may be trying to plan the right way to make sure a patient gets the right care they desperately need despite the mountains of bureaucracy and administration trying to prevent it, and she may have the mental tools and experience to do that in a way that none of the rest of you do. And that's why it takes her longer.

Go ahead and judge her if it makes it easier for you to get through your day. But don't you dare go and accuse her and file a complaint without a lot more substantial evidence than you shared here. Because from everything you said, I can only come to the conclusion that YTA.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 13 hours ago

Right, given that you answered genuinely and constructively I’m answering you.

This stuff being the first thing that comes to your mind when you start talking about this coworker I think tells us more about you than it does about the coworker.

yes, it tells you I mean she is unfit to do this job.

I see a nurse who to me is incapable of doing this job because, as said, she won’t pick up any tray or serve food and beverages, and I don’t want to work with a person like this because it means I have to be the one serving her patients as well as mine and as said this unit is chronically understaffed. It’s very frustrating being the one moving patients and delivering food trays and beverages while she sits in front of a computer. This is not what I signed up for.

I don’t know how future me nearing retirement is going to be, but it’s clear I have to quit bedside or study something else, precisely not to become this coworker because as you said, nursing is hard as f*ck on the body.

You write “She deserves some credit, some respect, and some empathy – you’re going to be there too, someday.” You speak like somebody who has the luxury of not having to deal with the consequences of a coworker who gives you the physically harder tasks while she, as said, sits. You understands it’s a bit difficult for me to agree with you, right? Options for her? retire or move to a desk position, both perfectly legitimate options, but don’t pretend to qualify for a job she physically cannot do anymore. Hell, even I cannot sometimes.

OTOH this is not as much her fault as management’s and society’s at large: If we had 3 RN instead of 2, we possibly wouldn’t have this problem, reason why the best I can do might be keep looking for another position, quit this one ASAP and think about studying to get away from nursing. No wonder nobody wants to be a nurse with this job conditions: just today 6 ICU RNs working quit, if you believe one of my coworkers. This ship is sinking.

Happy downvoting I guess.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

On the other hand, some coworkers fucking suck and don’t do work. And the only one here who knows what OPs coworker is in this situation is going to be OP.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 days ago

I've certainly worked with a lazy coworker or two, but I generally give them the benefit of the doubt until I've been there longer than a week.