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Besides the active forum with an off-topic section recommendation, I've gotten the sense a lot of this style of communication has shifted from forums to group chats in whatever messaging app people are using, whether it's Discord or Whatsapp or whathaveyou.
It's unfortunate as those aren't the same style at all, but seems to be how things are now. It's part of why I wish more fediverse instances would instead operate with a site mindset and try to build distinct identities. A few do and they're much more interesting for it imo, feeling like the small community site they are in a good way.
Interesting insight. Perhaps the underlying issue is privacy. The web is public. In a world where literally everyone is on it (this was not the case in the 90s), having conversations there may just feel a bit icky for many people. You need to protect yourself with pseudonyms, you're always subconsciously censoring personal information from comments, and so on. Semi-private group chats take a lot of this pressure off. I get that.