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I work at a pretty progressive company (comparatively but definitely not perfect) and DEI there has nothing to do with preferential treatment, nor does it need to be.
The fact is that if you want to hire the top X people in the labor market, but your hiring and business practices exclude, say, half of that market, you absolutely will not get the actual top X. You will have to reach deeper into your half and be forced to pick people that are less qualified and/or capable.
So DEI, at least where I'm at, is about widening that pool so that you can actually get top talent. That means reevaluating your business practices to figure out why you're excluding top talent. Maybe your recruiters always go to specific colleges for recruitment and certain websites. Maybe just the way they're talking to candidates is more attractive to a certain type of person. Maybe you've got hiring requirements and an interview process that is not actually predictive of success. Maybe candidates are looking for some benefit that you're not offering. Everything needs to be looked at.
For example, "Women just want more flexible working arrangements so that's why we can't get them" is something I hear often. Well, have you actually evaluated why your company is so inflexible? Is it actually necessary? Or are your executives a bunch of people who learned how to manage in the 20th century and haven't changed since then? Maybe there are things you can do to enter the 21st century and make room for more women, not just because they're women, but because you gain access to people who are actually better at their job than the ones you've had. Not every company can be supremely flexible, of course, but the number of times that inflexibility is actually necessary of much smaller than its prevalence.
The demographic breakdown of your workforce is a quick and easy weathervane to help figure out how these efforts but of course they're not everything. Diversity comes in maybe forms, not just skin color and genitals. But in my company they're used in a backwards looking manner, to see how new policies are working, not for quota filling and preferential treatment.
That sounds like a good and well thought out DEI program. But there are also DEI programs that were just quotas. I’m not saying they are the majority or even common but just one lends credence to the “it’s racism” narrative.