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Teacher who gave birth to 13-year-old student’s baby started molesting him when he was 11, court docs allege
(www.independent.co.uk)
this post was submitted on 20 Jan 2025
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Do you have adult friends, aunt, uncles, grandparents, whatever, that can spent quality time with your children or is every adult a potential abuser and you watch them all with the same level of scrutiny?
To be honest this is something what I'd expect to hear from survivor who hasn't processed their trauma. I'm not trying to tell you you're wrong to be vigilant, but to me this reads like a subconscious cry for help. I might be totally wrong, in which case I'm sorry.
Yep.
Yep.
Nope.
Keep in mind that child abuse is most commonly perpetrated by someone the child knows, often a relative or a close family member. Access, proximity, trust, power dynamics, secrecy, and etc all play into it.
I don't have to be always present when my child is someone, with say, a grandparent. What is important is that communication between myself and my children remains open and that any compromising or inappropriate behavior is revealed when it happens.
Children need to be taught that certain behaviors are never permissible and certain areas of their body are absolutely off limits to anyone save their parents or doctor. Any adult that tells them to keep a secret is doing something that's absolutely not okay. I could elaborate more and give more details, but I'm hoping you get the premise. And yes, there's always exceptions to things.
Parents should keep an eye on people who interact with their children. Children should be prepared to know what is okay and what is not okay. Anything that falls outside those bounds should be reported to a parent. Perhaps it was nothing. Perhaps it was the start of something absolutely inappropriate. You don't know unless you communicate.
What happened to the kids in this article never should have been permitted to happen. And yet as the environment was created for abuse, it seems no one stepped in or did anything.
I'd like to think you mean well by your comment, so no need to be sorry.
I absolutely hope that a victim of such abuse would be vigilant. Unfortunately, that might come out pretty distorted if they haven't processed things. For those who have suffered and got the help they needed, I would hope that they remain vigilant. And for those who've never been a victim, I would hope they also be vigilant.
There's a reason a lot of countries have mandatory reporting laws. There's a reason a lot of organizations have youth protection training now. There's also a reason numerous organizations have been sued to oblivion for allowing child abuse to persist and for not properly addressing it when it happens.
Take some time to look up child abuse statistics, the perpetrators, how it was allowed to happen, and etc. I think you might be surprised by how common it is and how some simple steps can very seriously mitigate it.
Vigilance means remaining watchful and being intentional, not paranoid.