this post was submitted on 30 Dec 2024
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It’s insane to me that someone who has trouble socializing would force themselves to go to parties. Maybe it’s something I’m too autistic to understand. Disabilities are suppose to get you out of doing shit. For example I use my epilepsy to never step foot in a club cuz lights. I’m not even photosensitive 😂
The thing is, it can be really hard to accurately assess why you feel an aversion to things, and whether or not that aversion is misplaced. I can come up with scads of seemingly reasonable objections to, for example, going to the gym. That doesn't mean that I wouldn't benefit from it.
Overcoming an innate aversion that you've convinced yourself is a part of who you are can be life-changing.
That sounds like something normal people do.
I mean, not to put too fine a point on it, but what the fuck is normal? Nobody's really normal. Even the so-called neurotypical are riddled with undiagnosed disorders. Normalcy is just a social fiction. Don't let it limit your options.
Life-changing isn't always for the better. Usually it's a lateral move at best.
For the longest time I would try to push myself out of my comfort zone. I thought eventually my feelings about doing "normal people stuff" would change. They did not.
I felt this in my soul. Never seen anyone else express this so thanks for helping me feel less alone in that department
"Parties" is barely a category, everyone has a different idea of what one should be. There's A LOT of variation. To some people it's sitting around a table playing board games, to others it's about getting drunk and hooking up, and anywhere in between.
Personally I'm AuDHD and I can stans certain types of parties and not others. I actually kinda hate playing board games and prefer going out as long as there's music. Lots of bodies present isn't a problem for me, it's actually the opposite. The worst type of party is one where I'm expected to socialize as the main event.
At work we all sing happy birthday, I hate it when it's my turn
Just tell people you don't like dancing, or karaoke, or whatever enough times and eventually they internalize it. I spent years cultivating a reputation with my friends and now I can just vanish for an hour at any party and nobody bats an eye. Need my "me time". New people sometimes think I'm cold or don't like them but they either learn and that's cool or I don't see them again and it doesn't matter.
Because sometimes I can have a lot of fun if I'm feeling up to it. It just depends on my mood or whatever at the time, I can't really predict or explain it.