this post was submitted on 22 Jul 2026
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As an ape, I don't know if I'm cool with Matt Walsh sucking my dick to save a human life.
I'm cool with it. For clout. I'm not even into dudes, but I'd like to contribute to his misery.
I hadn’t thought of it like that. Count me in for the story to tell, I guess.
Death cause: Choked on dick
Now that's a complement!
I dunno, it would mean that he's gotten close enough to me to stomp on his fucking face so might be worth it.
Yeah I bet he doesn't use conditioner in his beard and uses teeth and smells like old hot dog water because he bathes in old hot dog water