this post was submitted on 30 Jun 2026
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Autism
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When talking to people try to see what they want. Do they wanna hear a story? They want advice? They want an ear to do catharsis? Sometimes just ask even. Sounds stupid to ask but it helps. Using that one as a segway. People just sometimes assume that something is like that if you say it with enough confidence I learned a little bit of acting so I go by the character and pretend I have the confidence. One great example I used loads of time at work is sometimes I go to some people and if I say "ya know I have my stupid question of the week voucher and I'm gonna use it with you" then ask whatever I need to know usually when I think they assume I know something I do not really know. Trick is I totally invented that dynamic and I do not keep track of it and ask away.
That's masking, and it's harmful to you - the energy you have to spend to maintain that will eventually lead to burnout. Speaking frombitter experience here. Your interlocutor has no such energy expenditure, so it's easy for them.
Yes and no. If they are straining or pretending, then yes. The first part, about them trying to see what other people want, can be very draining. But the other part, about simply asking questions, can be very healthy.
If a person with red-green colorblindness is constantly straining to try to tell the difference between the colors, that can be unhealthy. If they pretend their eyes are perfect and they can see colors easily, they will have multiple problems.
But asking someone you trust to tell you what the color is, can help everyone involved. And figuring out a no-stress way of asking, can be beneficial.