this post was submitted on 29 May 2026
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I'm genuienly convinced that cats can understand human language at least half as well as dogs, and they just actually do not fucking care about what we are saying, 95% of the time.
I think they are telepathic
I mean, both dogs and cats can smell significantly better than you can.
They can nearly literally smell your stress, fear, sadness... anything in a human that is regulated or expressed via horomones? They can smell that.
https://articles.hepper.com/can-dogs-smell-emotions/
Cats also can smell much better than a human can, I see no reason why a domesticated one would not also be able to do similar things as dogs.
https://vetexplainspets.com/cats-sense-of-smell-vs-dogs/
So they don't need to have ... Charles Xavier style telepathy.
They just need to use their relatively superpowered sense of smell, to have a pretty good read of the emotions you're feeling.
And! Well... many cats technically do carry a kind of parasite, that does impact human minds.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toxoplasma_gondii
So, given that T. Gondii literally manipulates the genes in a human that govern your neurons... that arguably also constitutes an indirect form of mind control.
Last bit:
Dogs, as we domesticated them from wolves... literally grew muscles in their faces, around their eyesockets, that allow them to have and make human style eyebrow expressions.
Probably not 'mind control', but... sure helps with interspecies communication.
Cats are the reason I'm suicidal? 😮
I mean... theroetically plausible as a contributing factor, but suicidal ideation typically has ... many contributing factors.
Also, can I offer you a hug via the internet?
Yeah me too, except I think they understand it all. They just don't fucking care and it makes me mad.