change my view

Meltdowns are caused by being overwhelmed by a lot of stuff that you can't get off your chest because no one will ever listen to you or treat you like a human being, full stop.

No kid is angry over a candy bar; they're flipping tables and making themselves bleed over years of bullying from their family, literally being bullied into growing up too early and into not growing at all, never going outside, being in a "school" where the staff shoves them to the floor and ties their hands behind their back as punishment for getting 98/100 on a worksheet; riding a bus where they can't do anything but look out of the window where everyone outside points and laughs, being bullied for smelling bad but also being bullied out of showering, and being told by everyone that they are the problem, that they're only angry because they're ungrateful and spoiled.

And yes, those who can't talk are frustrated at being unable to communicate. But sure, keep giving them sleep aids, prison food, and Cocomelon to shut them up instead of giving them a chance to communicate, learn, and grow.

For a disorder that's so stupidly infinite and can be anything (this is so fucking stupid), everyone is treated the same. The heavily dyslexic person with severe dyslexia who can still learn and grow is treated the same as a person who can't read or talk at all, and regardless of their ages they're all treated like they're 5. The former person just had an issue reading so they spend their whole childhood not being educated, and being abused until they go insane and are put in a group home. The other person is never given any opportunity to communicate with anyone and also goes insane until they're put in a home. The first person could have had a real life, a job, friends (who actually aren't bullies), and real experiences, but now they rot in prison because their dyslexia was called that stupid puzzle piece shit.

When will you realize these institutions for puzzle pieces are for profit and abuse the kids into being such dead weight that they don't even pursue trying to leave? But first, when will you realize that stupid disorder is fake? It's literally just parts of every other disorder, which all have names, definitions, and treatments. But sure, keep calling it that puzzle piece, and keep suffering from untreated mental illness, and continue calling the effect of going on without actual treatment that stupid puzzle piece. Because you're not suffering from anything, you decide to get angry because you're spoiled, right?

If you were abused and bullied your whole life as a child because of that shit, what you're dealing with today is most likely CPTSD. CPTSD can make you feel stuck around the age your life peaked at, cause a lot of brain fog, cause issues with coordination, and a lot more things associated with that stupid puzzle piece. That includes being awkward especially if you grew up isolated. That includes not getting sarcasm and being frustrated with others refusing to just be concise. Interesting, abused children have symptoms of being abused children no way. No fucking way. Shocking.

And for the adults calling themselves that crap for TikTok likes, just quit. You know you only want likes on social media. That stupid puzzle piece is not an explanation for why you struggled with some random mundane thing. That crap means nothing, it can't explain anything when it means absolutely nothing.

You have no idea what it's like to actually have every aspect of yourself reduced to that fakeass puzzle piece, and live dehumanized by everyone in your life. You have no idea what it's like to be in a real school where the staff have meetings on what to do with you, and how scared they are of you because you got into a violent game series called "Fortnite" and they don't know why your parents allow you to consume restricted adult media. And of course, you're not invited to these meetings, and you'll be forced to deal with whatever conclusion they come up with.

You have no idea what it's like to have everyone in the school gaslight you into believing you're violent and dangerous for everything you do, force you to be friends with people you're not interested in, single you out for having nice things as that makes you spoiled (everyone else is normal though), and spreading that the same stupid puzzle piece that made you so scary made you so smart and it's the only reason why you got a passing grade. And yes, a passing grade. You got 60% because a puzzle piece made you smart, and now you're filmed and broadcast to the literal world for being So Smart with your 60%. You will never know what it's like to be a celebrity in your school for things they don't deserve the attention, have your friends be secretly jealous of you, and have everyone in the building steal at least one thing from you as they assume you're a millionaire and it doesn't hurt you.

You had a real life, yet you want to look cool on the internet. Which you could do without spreading misinformation that literally kills people. You might as well say all those women in Afghanistan who can't get educated just don't like school, because you're a woman and you got educated and it's easy, and that being a woman is the same experience for everyone. Imagine enough people spreading that the women in Afghanistan aren't oppressed, they are just antiwork and anti-education, and how that can affect them and empower those oppressing them. That's you right now, justifying abuse towards disabled people who were never given a chance at life.

The first step to actually eradicating ableism is to eradicate that stupid puzzle piece label that enables and justifies ableism. Every child diagnosed with that crap has something else that can actually be treated, and they don't need to stagnate and grow into self hating burdens on their families. Eradicate that stupid puzzle piece and all of these children can have a real chance at a real life.

Additionally, eradicating that stupid label is a significant win for transgender rights with less people being forced to live as their birth gender. As, in that case, the person would have gender dysphoria, a condition with a name and actual treatment, instead of some meaningless "infinite" "spectrum" random label that means nothing and can't be treated because it's so individualized with everyone that stupid label is on.

My hate is at the label and the people who keep giving it false credibility, not those affected by its existence. Free the children whose lives were ravaged by that stupid label, and eradicate it. Give these children real lives instead of making them wait to die in a cruel death waiting room.

If you believe in disability and LGBTQ rights, you do NOT believe in "autism".

Their lives most likely peaked already and they know everything is going to get worse later, so if you really love and care about the child you tell to go away and bully alongside your older children you actually spend time with, then you should let them go. What is the point of growing up as a joke and continuing to be a joke? Living out of spite gets tiring when literally everyone is rooting for you to fail.

You most likely did not want a(nother) child, and that should be no one's problem. Not yours, and most importantly not the child's. The child also shouldn't be tossed in a cruel game of hot potato for the rest of their life where more people abuse and bully them for fun. If everyone wants the kid gone including the kid themselves then what is the issue? Life only gets better for people who are loved and wanted.

The reward from parenting is raising an awesome strong kind productive member of society that you could actually be proud of and create amazing memories with.

How your child feels towards you is a reflection of how you treat them. Children aren't born hating their parents.

And before some suddenly victimized unthanked employees lament about their teenage children's dirty rooms, maybe try to understand their perspective where they're overwhelmed with assignments and grades while also being pressured to work and own property as early as possible, while being bullied by other teens for being unemployed and not a homeowner at 14 and dealing with fake friends and crap on top of all the usual teenage emotions and hormones and crap, on top of you antagonizing an overwhelmed human child for showing signs of being overwhelmed.

Loved children aren't filthy and depressed enough for their living space to suffer. Buying iPads isn't love.

Can we end this stupid cozy cottagecore primitive barbaric stupidity already?

Imagine if the space used to house two families was used to house several people instead, with recreational areas, shared terraces, private terraces, and a place to keep stupid cars off the street when they're not used.

That would be bad, actually. The land should have two houses, each with a patch of grass to continue some literally primitive trend of having non-producing land to show off wealth. You're not rich, you literally can't afford fixing your heater without going a week without eating or risking losing your house or job altogether. We aren't farming on our land either. What is the point of this stupid grass that needs to be maintained?

And despite "privacy" being a selling point, the houses are so close that you need to choose between being watched or having sunlight. If your neighbor smokes, you will as well regardless of whether you like it or not, unless you want to wear a gas mask or something. And if they throw a party with music so loud you can't hear anything in your house even with headphones, then you'll just need to wait until it's over to sleep or watch TV. You better not take out trash or order food during that party, because no one will move out the way for you, and the party animals will steal your order. Unless you want to try fighting high or drunk teenagers who were playing with tiki torches and sparklers.

You see, living in an apartment with actual walls between the residences and rules against smoke and excessive noise can't ever be comfortable. And having so many apartments available won't keep the prices down either! You're supposed to bankrupt yourself on a house you settled for while repairing something else every two weeks to keep it habitable. You're supposed to have trash pile up when you're scheduled for mandatory overtime and you leave too early to take out the trash and return too late as the truck already left for consecutive weeks. You're supposed to lose your house in a natural disaster or a fire caused by a teenager throwing their still burning joint on your lawn. You're supposed to make $55,000 a year and still struggle to get by. And you're supposed to enjoy it. This is happy. This is cozy.

If houses became apartments, there were more jobs in the area, and everyone got around by walking or biking, the population actually will be happier. Bike broke? No problem, walk, work a week, get a new one. Car broke? You are now on the slippery slope that leads to homelessness. Happy!

Luxury condominiums are way better than "luxury houses" anyway, but sure yeah you really need to protect your homestead with a gun like you're in a cheesy black and white film. We say fuck cars, cars ruin cities, but where are the people saying fuck houses?

Can't spell abandon without ABA

Instead of getting to actually know your child, you assume some vague meaningless word caused their problems, toss them in some "school" that is supposed to "help" with those problems, while ignoring and disregarding the child's needs.

Hey, guess what? Isolating your child and treating them like a joke at best and a burden you and the entire world is better off without at worst, is quite literally a traumatic experience for your child. Literally not hugging your child causes touch starvation which could develop into goddamn PTSD.

But like everything else you and literal professional child abusers have done to your child, you'll call the affects of their anguish "autism" and just not do anything about it! Every other child could be suicidal because of bullies and abusive family, but your child is only suicidal because autism. Children pee and poop themselves when physically or sexually abused, but your child only suffers because autism. Instead of getting to the bottom of what's causing your child's suffering, you call it autism and ignore it or try to cover it up.

These "schools" destroy the child and literally gaslights them into believing every part of being a human being is a spoiled hissy fit tantrum. That wiping your ass is a tantrum because you just don't like having wet privates after using the toilet. That showering and having clean underwear is a tantrum because you just don't like not being clean. The child would regress entirely on healthy habits while being uncomfortable and itchy, and not say or do anything because they believe that's being a "good kid". And you believe your child is gross because autism and not because they literally got abused into believing their comfort and health don't matter.

You have no idea what your child is going through in "school" and you don't care since it's not one of your actually loved children. You must only act like you care for an excuse to yell at someone since you literally abuse, bully, and neglect your child in the same ways, if not worse, at home.

So many children could have grown into actually functional adults but their futures are brutally taken from them by a meaningless word that literally has no definition. They're raised to be dependent corpses in those "schools", the parents think the child becoming a corpse is solely a result of autism, and the children are locked away in group homes where they live lives so mediocre and sad that the best thing they will ever had experienced was eating a candy bar when they were 6 years old.

That stupid word ruins lives before they're given a chance to start. Get to know your fucking child. Raise your fucking child. Your TV and Netflix will be there later, your child's childhood won't.

Edit: formatting/grammar, also looks like I'm being downvoted by people who lived real childhoods and rode public transit or walked to real school and grew up real humans who were raised to be real functioning adult human people in real human society who took a trendy TikTok test and call themselves autistic for internet clout that literally won't matter in a year; then spread how autism is not that bad, how they don't suffer as often, and how they wish they were diagnosed as a child so they could have been "helped" while having zero idea what "help" is like for children that aren't seen as humans or even rats (literally if an animal went through what I went through, my abusers would be jailed for animal cruelty); all while spreading harmful misinformation like autism being The Reason Why they like drawing anthropomorphic animal characters, playing popular video games, enjoying things aimed at younger audiences, or knowing a lot about a random subject; all for literally imaginary internet points that don't matter to anyone else and won't matter to them in a year. You got internet points at the cost of pushing disability rights back to when the nazis were euthanizing babies. Was it worth it?

I believe it was purely for reasons of expansion. I don't know exactly what our response should have been, but we need to at least acknowledge that Ukraine is defending their sovereignty and Putin/Russia are the aggressors. We should support them at least minimally.

So a bit about me, I'm a very practical-oriented, some might say cheap person. I look at excessive luxury as a moral failing at any wealth level, either because you should be giving that money to charity, or because you should be saving it so you don't end up needing charity yourself someday.

However, finding a woman with a compatible mindset has always been a challenge, and it seems to be getting harder every year. I've been dating mostly online for a good while, and prior to the pandemic I pretty much never ran into a woman with a lot of luxuries in her life. Now it seems like almost every profile features a woman showing off a LV/YSL/Gucci purse that cost 4 figures or more. These luxury brand purchases are the hardest thing for me to relate to, because it's just the brand - it's purely to signal that you could afford to send some corporation your hard-earned money for virtually no reason. And you don't have to take my word for it, luxury goods are booming, especially among gen Y and Z.

Problem is, I'm finding it harder and harder to cut this massive chunk of the population out of my dating pool. I'm also attracted to the look of feminine accessories like jewelry and heels (isn't everyone?). And while I don't care if it's cheap accessories, there seems to be basically a 100% overlap between women who wear feminine accessories and those who like spending lots of money on brand names. I kinda hit rock bottom recently when I went on a date with a low-wage worker which made me excited that maybe I finally found someone down to earth enough, and then even she showed up with a $1200 purse (yes I looked it up).

So it's time to pause and seek alternative perspectives. I want to keep looking for the cheap-yet-feminine woman. But at the same time, I feel increasingly like I'm being an extremist. Is there some way I can understand the need for luxury brand purchases differently so I can find it more acceptable in a long term partner?

So many things behave exponentially that it makes sense to measure time exponentially.

@changemyview

#cmv

…or at least only non-romantic love. I’m learning about history of western philosophy and understand that Plato’s Symposium describes his theory on love and that a person initially desires physical love, but then eventually grows to love things that feel fulfilling, and eventually love the ideal form of beauty itself. It seems like more of a spectrum/progression that includes romantic/physical love, not abstaining from it. “Platonic love” would seem to include physical love and doesn’t seem consistent with the dictionary definition of “friendship love.”

Any thoughts on that?

like jesus feels sexier than family and historical slaughter

Stop looking at me, Swan?!

I just want to dip my toe in ChangeMyView, I love the idea. Let's do a practice round