5parky

I've been saying this for months. How long until 47 "has a stroke."

Jesus is always on the job site by 730 with his tools and a smile on his face.

So a shitgun instead of a poostol.

You don't know old until you've had to change the IRQ for your sound card because wolf3d.exe's settings were different than swotl.exe.

Gimme a stoner any day. Better than trying to talk a roided up jock half way through a bottle of tequila out of punching his nana. I don't consume myself because weed just puts me to sleep. I guess I'm mellow enough.

Remember when Idiocracy was a farce instead of a documentary?

Doppler effect.

With reddit eating X's ass on the highway to insignificance.

I have revived multiple computers and my mom's windshield wipers with concussive application of a rubber chicken.

I was just thinking earlier today that I miss Tim Walz. Walz 2028!

Diesel too?

My cat is obsessed with my socks. If a load of clean laundry has been left too long before it gets folded and put away, my socks will be scattered throughout the house.