selfimprovement

Mostly practice. It's very important to not take feedback personally, but use it to further your growth.

Exposure therapy. Make yourself talk to people, put yourself in public spaces where short term light hearted conversation is acceptable, bars, interest groups, anything that puts you in a context with people who will be talkative.

Then just, do it. Over and over.

Depends on which social skills. Regardless of the end goal, you need to start with empathy and consider the other persons situation. Importantly, that they might not be looking for new friends. Be ready to face rejection and that's nothing wrong with you.

Your first goal is to Open or start a conversation, and hopefully keep the other person engaged long enough to let the relationship develop and grow. Typically this is as simple as listening, complimenting or "peacocking" or standing out in attempt to attract the same. Speak your mind, you are trying to find your people! If you comment on appearance be polite, indirect, and be sure not to objectify the person not ~"nice ass", aim for "I love your anime shirt!". It's going to take some attempts before it feels more natural. That works out because you need to engage with a lot of people. Note: If you can't find people, you need to start a hobby.

Next goal is to engage the person and act interested, at this stage you should celebrate opening. Few things to try to keep in mind: Eye contact, questions, active listening, repeating to assert understanding, mirroring, match vocal tone/pitch. But most importantly "Yes and". This means, accept their addition and add to it. Shutting stuff down is easy, contributing is hard. You are trying to build.

Lastly close. Did you have fun, did you share energy? Tell them! Validate that feeling and ask for a followup contact information. From here you will need to balance give and take in the relationship and try to make it mutually beneficial.

My favorite openers:

• What are you passionate about today
• When/what really pissed you off recently
• You made me smile, are you looking for new friends
• Relevant comment based on location/accessories
• I'm bored, got any stories