Comic Strips

I don't hate dogs because of the specific behaviors of one dog. I hate them for a huge variety of reasons. I even made a big ass list.

• Most are aggressive when put under certain circumstances. There are 4.7 million reported dog bites per year in the US alone. When humans or other animals behave aggressively, we see it as a bad thing. When dogs do it, we see it as everyone else's fault except the dog's, despite many dogs being predisposed to aggression. Many dogs who receive nothing but love their whole life are aggressive in non-threatening situations in spite of the owner's efforts to combat these behaviors. Just as many people are delusional enough to think that this is a human-centric problem and not foundationally due to the aggression implicit in all dogs. Many owners have neither the time nor money required to fix these problem behaviors, and many dogs are either highly resistant or impossible to train. These discussions mirror excuses for abusers almost perfectly: make excuses, don't place blame on the aggressor, don't want the aggressor to be "in trouble", it's never the aggressor's fault because the victim "pushed" the aggressor, the aggressor is normally a good person/dog, etc. We as humans are just compensating for a dumb, aggressive animal's predisposition towards violence all while making excuses for why they are so awful.

• Relationships with dogs are extremely shallow. They are conditioned and bred to like us, and we like them because they are cute, playful, and instinctively loyal. There is no deeper connection to dogs besides that, at least to me, and certainly for the dog. Relationship with dogs are not rewarding because they require no effort and have no meaningful connection. Any dog would love any person who is around them for a long time as long as they are receiving positive attention. This makes relationships with dogs effectively meaningless; they do not say anything about the human or the dog beside that they are around each other a lot, as compared to human-to-human relationships that show effort was put in.

• Dogs require a lot of personal sacrifice. If you want to go anywhere for more than a few hours then they require care, which is often difficult and/or expensive to set up. Taking dogs with you on outings often leads to behavioral issues like barking and aggression, and creates extreme slowdowns to accommodate them. I also hate dogs to begin with, so it double sucks because they ruin my vibe. The outing is no longer about the environment or the people, those are secondary to ensuring the comfort and safety of an animal.

• Having a dog in your home means you can't focus on any particular task for more than a few hours because dogs require lots of play, attention, and need to be walked. Zoning in on my hobbies is my #1 favorite thing to do, and dogs ruin that.

• Dogs are extremely loud and obnoxious. They bark at random times which is startling, they whine and beg for food, and they tend to be destructive towards random things around the house. Most dogs will bark at unexpected visitors. They eat anything that smells good, even if it's poison.