this post was submitted on 04 Dec 2024

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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

Anon is often crazy.
Anon is often depressed.
Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works

Anon plays spin the bottle (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 1 year ago by Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works to c/greentext@sh.itjust.works

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[–] ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

It's interesting how just a few instances of surprise rejection early in life can have a big effect on personality. I ended up paranoid, always assuming that no one could really like me and anyone who acted as if he or she did was just pitying me or playing some cruel prank on me that I was too socially inept to see.

It got to the point that when I went to a school dance (I didn't want to but my parents made me) and the prettiest girl in the class asked me to dance with her, I actually got upset. I couldn't believe that she sincerely wanted to. I said yes because it would have been rude to say no, but I was convinced that everybody including her was secretly laughing at me.

I only considered the possibility that she was sincere years later, when I was an adult, but even now my brain is telling me "Nah, loser, she just felt sorry for you."

[–] lightnsfw@reddthat.com 1 points 1 year ago

It felt so weird when I got to college and started working and people were just treating me like a normal person. It took a long time for me to stop defaulting to trying to figure out what kind of trick they were playing on me. I still don't know wtf I did wrong as a child that made everyone decide I was to be ostracized.

[–] omgitsaheadcrab@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 year ago

[+] WastingCommentSpace@sh.itjust.works 0 points 1 year ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

[deleted]

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Would you be upset if you found out people considered you ugly?

[–] Gladaed@feddit.org 1 points 1 year ago

Disgusting is more accurate.

[–] dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

do people really get upset about this?

Yes. I'll dive in, assuming that the greentext is real; the scenario is plausible enough.

Romantic rejection is painful, as it's based on an instinct to achieve a strong mutual bond with someone else. This may or may not be conflated with a drive to reproduce, depending on the level of sexual attraction involved. The sensation of loss here, can manifest in actual physical pain in one's head and/or viscera, and is proportional to the level of "drive". This also gets coupled with a sensation of loss as the reward for achieving that mutuality is a moment that is usually followed by intense pleasure (even without sex); suddenly realizing that reward isn't coming, hurts.

The second part, where the group continues without Anon, is similar but a different phenomenon. It's rejection from the entire social group. Our instincts to be social creatures causes us to feel this as a loss (painful), because we're safer and stronger in groups. Instinctively, the sensation will subside once Anon figures out how be confident with being alone, or (more likely) finds a more compatible social group.

Attempting to introspect the above sensations without support can also go to bad places. Anon mentions his self-esteem - they are blaming themself since that's a position of "control", but ignoring the reality that this was all impossible to predict or avoid. In reality, the other partygoers are a bunch of insensitive assholes and carry 100% of the blame here. This person really needs to be around people with more empathy.

Combined, Anon is in a world of physical and psychological pain. They were denied a potential romantic and/or sexual reward, and were rejected by the entire social group. Both forms of rejection provoke instinct and our reward centers in ways that just make a person miserable.

[–] DATAGS@lemmy.world -1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Its not that serious

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

It is literally soul-crushing

[–] Nurse_Robot@lemmy.world -1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Anon self pities instead of self reflecting and fails to grow because of it

[–] sexy_peach@feddit.org 1 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I don't think that we have enough information to draw that conclusion. It is a legit horrible experience though. I can't imagine what it would be like.

[–] MossyFeathers@pawb.social 1 points 1 year ago

I can't say I've had the exact same experience, but I did get picked on by a bunch of "friends" at a birthday party. Tried to play truth or dare and I was a really honest, open kid (mostly), so when it was my turn I said, "truth" and someone asked me if I'd ever kissed a girl, and I said, "no". They decided that I had to be lying so they asked me a different question, "have I ever had a crush on a girl" to which I also said, "no". They didn't believe that either, and one of them jokingly asked, "have you (me being AMAB) ever kissed a boy?" That was coming from a kid in a really conservative Christian family, and it caught me off-guard. The truth was that no, I had never kissed a boy either, but the question made me hesitate. They lept on that.

[–] stinky@redlemmy.com 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Agreed. I think people who blame anon for being in pain fail to see the problem with the behavior of the selfish, stupid people at the party, which is ironic.

[–] Ookami38@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 year ago

I love that elsewhere, someone says anon should have taken more showers, then we have "stinky" with this insightful post.

I don't think it's anything more than coincidence, but it makes my brain feel good.

[–] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 1 points 1 year ago

I can. Been there. Couple times. My foster brother and I used to hang out with a bunch of other kids from ages 8-14, and whenever someone had a bright idea for a game like that, completely unprompted would come "but I'm not kissing Dharmacurious." Shut fucking hurt. I never asked to play those games, never tried to join in. Would try my best to excuse myself before someone suggested a game like that. I didn't have my first kiss until years and years and years after I lost my virginity, because I only ever did hookups with random strangers online, because I never felt like I was even capable of being desired in anyway other than a quick lay. Being ugly sucks. It truly, honestly does. I shower religiously, I brush my teeth (which, somehow, I still managed to get fucked in that department). Still, I send a picture online, blocked. I'm not an Incel or anything, I don't think I'm owed a damn thing, it's just the reality of the situation. I'm a fun, interesting person, with a good sense of humor, thick skin, intelligent, caring, loyal to a fault, and all the other things my shrink has helped me realize. But no one gets to know that, because there has to be some physical attraction for someone to want to get to that point. Can't fault em for that. But being a bridge troll is lonely, and it sucks. And up thread someone suggested they should shower. That's a fucked up thing to say, you don't know their life. And I know green text=fiction, but this one rings fucking true for some of us.

[–] MITM0@lemmy.world -1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Yeah cuz nobody (men+women) really like men, Men are truly the abused class Your typical man on the street is a woman-worshipper Like If I link peer-reviewed articles on this stuff, you'd call me an incel & a misogynist & not even provide counter-arguments/evidence You need to look yourself in the mirror & say that I'm a human male with self-respect If they don't want to play, Fine, find better friends

Hell I'm offering you all a hand in friendship

EDIT: Truth hurts huh😂

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Bruh I don't think I want anybody to play spin the bottle with you

[–] MITM0@lemmy.world -1 points 1 year ago

Why would you assume I even want to even talk to you ?

[–] PhobosAnomaly@feddit.uk -1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I mean, it sucks that you pinned your hopes on your crush having to follow a social pressure to kiss/fondle/fuck/whatever the "forfeit" for spin the bottle was in the first place.

It sucks that you had to go through that, but at what point does that declination of your advances suck less?

I mean, society has unfortunately favoured shitty games like "pull the bull" and "poke the bear" over any sort of genuine attraction which has usually disadvantaged women anyway - that's not to turn it into a gender thing, but maybe the idea of sparking a relationship from a forced interaction sucks from the outset.