Can't fuck their cousins and now they can't fuck their elevators, bama in absolute shambles
this post was submitted on 14 Oct 2026
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cousins still allowed, hence the other sign with "go ahead and fuck your cousin, cameras are watching"
Can’t fuck their cousins
Source?
To be fair, the ‘ol Crimson Tide does have some pretty good departments and programs. Tuscaloosa and Birmingham are pretty good cities with a lot of bright and progressive people. But once you get a few miles outside of the major metro areas and their suburbs, that’s when shit changes.
Sees sign
"Well, I guess I shouldn't..."
"Cameras are watching"
"Okay, I'm getting mixed messages here."
But can I use my Accommodator?
Yes but only if we can all watch
What about the regular buttons?
Step buttons
I think it's stuck
I thought buttons, generally speaking, were bereft of genetalia.
TIL
Can't you see?
They're all nipples.
This elevator is illegal to use.
Nipples are not genitalia...
Not with that attitude.
I like that they use the gender neutral "genitalia" like there is a chance that it's not a penis that has been causing problems.
I thought genitalia was that generation that grew up in Italy.
Women can have penises.
And men can have vaginas. But that's unrelated to using the term "genitalia".
I’m just pointing out that the term “penis” is still gender neutral.
Ah, I see what you meant. True.
At first I was annoyed by your comment, but then I realized that you are actually correct. I was just trying to use a word that included all types of genitalia and couldn't think of a better one.
I think the correct terminology would be "sex neutral."
No matter what gender the noodly appendage belongs to, it's still the only type of genital I can imagine being used to press buttons in an elevator
I've met the sort of people who'd try with a vulva. But they probably wouldn't be the first to do this. They might try after seeing it's only against the rules to use a penis
That's not very handicapped accessible then.
Quick, follow this up with the totally legit sign in the bathrooms telling students not to jack off in the showers because it causes plumbing problems.
Alabama sperm is built different.
Manufacturing secrets are kept in families
In the bible belt, it might be a felony to wash all those potential Gunn Juniors and Keighleighlynnes down the drain.
Let's be honest, the issue isn't genitalia in general, it's SPECIFIC genitalia. They aren't worried about women pressing the buttons with their genitalia. If they were, they could be charging to use that elevator.
Idk about you but I'm not tryna get slimed while I'm going down to pick up my doordash order
I absolutely am.
Okay, but I absolutely have pushed elevator buttons with my ass before.
Roll tide!
Note that this sign is not taped to me and therefore does not pertain to my buttons.
There was this girl back in college who wore really tight jeans. Every day. VERY tight, very revealing. Her name was Jen. She was known as Ms. Nitalia.
How would she even…?
'The hell happened there... 
Thats discriminatory against paraplegics who use their junk to push buttons.
“What floor do you want?” *unzips
Students? ITYM staff.
It doesn't say anything about pressing, rubbing, slapping, or whipping.
Nothing a little bit of tape can't fix, hey look there's some already there.
Kids are dumb
Just put a different little tiny drop of sti on each one.
Alabama Roulette.
$20, same as in town
I love university signs, especially unofficial ones and misplaced ones