this post was submitted on 24 Sep 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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all 34 comments
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[–] kuberoot@discuss.tchncs.de 11 points 6 hours ago

This is AI slop

[–] rustydrd@sh.itjust.works 12 points 9 hours ago
[–] SlurpingPus@lemmy.world 6 points 8 hours ago* (last edited 4 hours ago)

But consider: which of the tiger's appendages can you yank for amusement if you're a gibbon?

[–] psx_crab@lemmy.zip 3 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

Just become a zookeeper and you get to take care a tiger cub. Problemo solved.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 1 points 2 hours ago

you have to be the right kind of zoowarden. my friend who works with the elephants never gets to bring any cool animals home. a friend lived next door to the big cat lady and she brought home a cub any time they had one.

[–] TheStaffmaster@lemmy.world 5 points 9 hours ago

A well fed tiger is not that dangerous. If you keep it that way it might even let you give it snuggles!

[–] SethTaylor@lemmy.world 4 points 9 hours ago

You can't tell me what to do!

I still have seven of my fingers left from last time!

[–] RickyRigatoni@piefed.zip 11 points 12 hours ago (1 children)
[–] ignotum@lemmy.world 1 points 8 hours ago

I read this not as a challenge but as an actual plea, because you know you won't be able to stop yourself if one day the opportunity to pet a tiger appeared

[–] Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 3 points 9 hours ago

You're not my Dad.

[–] NatakuNox@lemmy.world 24 points 15 hours ago
[–] Evil_Shrubbery@thelemmy.club 2 points 9 hours ago

Booo, I downvote this oppression!!
(Not really, just joking)

[–] DigDoug@lemmy.world 45 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

...but what if I go "psspsspss" and the tiger comes up to me?

[–] KokusnussRitter@discuss.tchncs.de 26 points 17 hours ago

Then they are either very cool or you are very dead. Either way, worth it.

[–] Stolas@lemmy.ca 5 points 12 hours ago

Big kitty. Must pet anyway.

[–] nialv7@lemmy.world 29 points 18 hours ago (4 children)

you can pet a tiger at least once

[–] ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 11 hours ago

The spot on his back just before his tail looks like fair game. My kitty also likes that spot, but mostly wants face pets.

[–] Gyrcas@piefed.zip 19 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

If dangerous, why fluffy and friend shaped?

[–] DickFiasco@sh.itjust.works 9 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Proof that life isn't fair

[–] I_Fart_Glitter@lemmy.world 4 points 11 hours ago

Your user name is 😚🤌

[–] DarkDarkHouse@lemmy.sdf.org 4 points 12 hours ago

There's one place you can pet it still. You'll never guess where.

[–] FilthyShrooms@lemmy.world 13 points 16 hours ago

Someone messed up and put "not" all over this picture, other than that though it's a good guide

[–] Quokka@quokk.au 4 points 13 hours ago

el tigre? Who took the boop?

[–] BC_viper@lemmy.world 13 points 17 hours ago

Ah. But you can catch it by the toe.

[–] usualsuspect191@lemmy.ca 3 points 12 hours ago

Anyone else now thinking of the scene in Red Dragon where the blind woman does a little sneaky "turn and cough" check on the sedated tiger?

[–] rbos@lemmy.ca 3 points 13 hours ago

Only in Kenya.

[–] Gonzako@lemmy.world 1 points 10 hours ago
[–] snoons@lemmy.ca 5 points 17 hours ago

You definitely can but it takes a long time and you have to say "chhfchhffchff" not "psspsspsspss" because that's not tiger language.

Essentially you have to be around when the liger is born.

[–] hoshikarakitaridia@lemmy.world 2 points 15 hours ago

They will call you a tiger toucher

[–] OnyxRex@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 17 hours ago

when was the last time the tiger ate and how full of a meal was it?