Doesn't matter because that's the western Orthodox baptist second reformed heaven and you were a heathen western Orthodox baptist first reformed
this post was submitted on 03 Sep 2026
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The odds of gettin the right religion kif any god exist at all) is so fricking low that i may aswell live how i want instead of following a religion;
Heck, i'd like to be religious but every religion seem to be quite shitty, the only ones who basically convinced me are Wiccas, which i may join in the near future
"God forgives all" I ain't sweating.
Pheh, who needs heaven anyway, just install linux onto the afterlife.
Can heaven run doom tho?
SEE??? PROOF.
CHECKMATE, ATHEISTS
Nazis, Israeli abominations, and christian pedophiles go to heaven... why the fuck would I want to go to heaven and be stuck with them for eternity?
Did you personally go to heaven and verify?
Fairly sure some people did go to Heaven.
It was nothing but empty, no gods, only suns everywhere.
Disappointing.
Sure
If you're convinced out of your faith, it means you never had a good reason to believe in the first place.
Correct because it doesn't exist.
Imagine a club where you can rape and pillage your entire life, ask for forgiveness on your dying breath and you're in.
As long as you don't intend to ask for forgiveness in the first place
Right. You have to have genuine remorse. Still dumb though.
I dunno, I guess I think punitive justice is an inherently fucked up concept. When I was a kid, adults used to say two wrongs don't make a right. At first I thought they were full of shit, but as I grew older, I learned how horrible prisons are and how they don't make people better.
In Christianity, you have to mean it. People can't turn their beliefs on a dime like that, meaning it takes work. You have to have done the work. Anyone who's successfully sacrificing Jesus would basically be capable of giving a meaningful apology to the victims and rehabilitating themself.
Still, heaven isn't for Me. It's just not My aesthetic. When I die, I'm going to Ninuan.
Sure, they can be forgiven, by God, after they suffered a horrible death themselves.
We don't even have to execute them, just denny them any services or any companionship from society. Anything not a basic need, and they will wish they died.
After all the Deans being posted on Lemmy, I think I want to talk about Community.
After Chang kidnapped the Dean and took over the school and was defeated by the study group, he showed up claiming to have Changnesia. Changnesia is a ridiculous lie and nobody believes it at first, but they decide to give him a chance, because we've all done bad things.
Over time we get confirmation that Chang faked his Changnesia, and the characters end up pretty sure of it too. But still, they don't expose him as a fraud and they don't send him to prison, where legally, he belongs. Because prison doesn't solve problems.
Nobody ever trusts Chang again. Everyone knows he can't be trusted. He can't be given power. He's evil. But he also has feelings, and he deserves happiness, as long as his happiness doesn't involve hurting anyone.
May we all have our own redemption, even if it must come from something as absurd as Changnesia.
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When your friend convinced you to go to church and get molested and there is no God
Pikachu
Religion makes predators
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"Drake... Where are our names in the Book of Life ?"
You should see it this way: Look at our world. Look at the bad things. Look at the horrific things. God lets all those things happen AND he wants his dick sucked as if he doing jack shit is a good thing.
Go to hell. Be a rebel. Be proud of it.
The worst people in this world don't think about these things. They are the ones in "heaven".
If that's the company in heaven, it sounds fucking awful.
You don't understand, all that suffering and all those dead babies are part of His plaaaaaaan. How can you even have morals without believing in god, please excuse the piles of dead babies.
Dead babies?
"God works in mysterious ways."
"Trust God's plan."
"Everything happens for a reason."
"You have to have faith."
"We should pray."
"He is testing our faith, like the book of Job."
These are the bullshit answers they give us because they don't really have an answer.
And when something good happens what do they say?
"God is good!"
"Praise the Lord!"
Look, believe in God all you want but when someone pisses on you, don't call it rain.
Have a meaningful conversation of how an all powerful, good God can allow so much suffering. Either he isn't good or he isn't powerful.
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When the Christian friend convinces you into religion, but it turns out God hates belief in false gods more than non-belief (you picked the wrong religion).
There is only one guy who guessed correct religion after particularly vivid mushroom trip, but he's still in hell because he started doing correct things for the wrong motivation.
you picked the wrong religion
There is no way that most people didn't pick the correct religion. Even if all Christians were "correct" enough to get to heaven regardless of denomination, that still leaves 71%+ of the world who aren't Christians. And that is best case scenario as Christians are the largest religious group by population in the world currently. And even within the Christian community, there are plenty of in-groups and out-groups that consider one another to be cultish and blasphemy. No matter what you are betting, your chances aren't great and the majority of the world is still "wrong" and will face whatever consequences come with that fact.
Personally, I'm happy to just not believe rather than to force myself to conform to some oppressive dogma, dump my time and money into a church, and live with shame just to hedge my bets for what would still be bad odds anyway.
I prefer the simple answer proposed by the Death of the Discworld: everyone is getting exactly what they think is coming to them. The final justice is that of your own conscience.
So pick a religion that aligns with your personal values and you'll be alright.
It always impresses me how Christianity = evangelicalism in the mind of most Lemmynauts. Outside evangelicalism (and even partly within evangelicalism), going to hell or heaven has nothing to do with being theologically correct or not. I mean, even the Catholic church, which is both by far the biggest one and absolutely not one of the most open ones states with an absolute clarity that non-Christians can go to heaven too.
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Well, nobody can go to heaven because the gates are closed.
The old Pascal's Wager. That's why I believe in every religion and none at the same time. I have to cover my bases.
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Just pull the ole', "Look! A distraction!" and disappear into the billions-strong crowd stuck in the same boat.
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