this post was submitted on 10 Jul 2026
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[–] MehBlah@lemmy.world 7 points 4 days ago

Fart to establish a perimeter.

[–] pedrobear@altgag.net 32 points 5 days ago (4 children)

If I ever find out ghosts live in my house, I'm going to bargain them: either pay basic services and half groceries or get exorcised. I live in front of a church, anyway.

[–] ExcessShiv@lemmy.dbzer0.com 20 points 5 days ago (1 children)

pay basic services and half groceries

That doesn't seem reasonable given they use neither of those...

[–] pedrobear@altgag.net 25 points 5 days ago (1 children)

They don't have use for a roof and walls either, but here we are

[–] ExcessShiv@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 5 days ago

Of course they have a use for that, their spirit is bound to the place that they haunt...come on man, that's ghost lore 101

[–] whoisearth@lemmy.ca 1 points 3 days ago

I purposely stare where I think they are when I masturbate to make them uncomfortable

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[–] Rachelhazideas@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

It's funny how many people here are discovering the basis of modern feng shui but vehemently deny it if you called it that.

[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 1 points 3 days ago

It's not about energies but about instincts.

[–] FishFace@piefed.social 23 points 5 days ago (7 children)

I be sleeping like a goddamn rotisserie chicken let me tell you

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[–] Zacryon@feddit.org 3 points 3 days ago

It's nice that two dead friends are watching my back to shield me from evil ghosts.

[–] Cordyceps@sopuli.xyz 4 points 4 days ago

I prefer sleeping on my left side most of the time, but this has me facing a wall. I have developed a psychological trick to mitigate my imagination of monsters sneaking in behind my back though: Imagine a pulsing protective dome around you, invisible to you on the inside, that blocks the monsters both physically and audibly outside of the barrier. This way I can safely imagine all the monsters I want, but they stay outside that barrier, so do not worry me at all and end up feeling safe. Being also a family man with kids and dogs in separate rooms, I do a mental excersise where I put up a shield over each of their sleeping places. This way I do not have to fear for their sakes either. If I have to go to the bathroom & kids rooms etc in the dark, especially if I have watched a late night horror film that has left me creeped out, I imagine being surrounded by a high current field that will zap anything that gets close. It usually helps to uust keep imagining a buzzing high voltage sound in my ears. Here are some tricks for anybody struggling with overly active imaginations.

[–] dingus@lemmy.world 15 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (3 children)

I went through a period of time in grad school where this feeling was so strong that it was absolutely affecting my ability to sleep. My bed was in the middle of the room. The headboard was facing the wall. One side of the bed had a view of a window and the other side a view of the door. The bed didn't really fit in a different orientation because the room was an incredibly strange shape.

No matter what, I could not figure out which side to face to stop the very strong sensation of something being there. I kept having to open my eyes to "check" that nothing was there. I would toss and turn and struggle to make the feeling of being watched go away. I would sometimes swear I heard something breathing. Sometimes I would sleep on the floor...dunno why that felt like it would sometimes do something. Maybe I was able to orient my back to a wall or something idk.

Glad that finally went away. I think I was under extreme stress or something. I also had relatively frequent bouts of sleep paralysis. But I cannot tell you how terrifyingly strong that feeling of demons coming to get me was, even though my rational mind knew there was nothing there.

I had a fear of the dark as a child though, even as an older child. Some nights I would go sleep on my younger brother's floor because I would get scared. So I had always had some issues with this. But this was dialed up to like 11. One time I couldn't sleep for multiple days during this grad school period.

Been fine since tho lol.

[–] Zozano@aussie.zone 11 points 4 days ago

You cannot sleep when there are enemies nearby

[–] Nomad@infosec.pub 2 points 3 days ago

I would bet this is an oh overly active survival instinct. I feel like people describe this if I'm awoken by an unknown noise in the house. Often i don't even know what awoke me, but I usually feel a mixture of vivid paranoia coming on mixed with the calm feeling the game of archival is on. I call it the silent killer mode and i imagine that's how cats feel on a hunt. Usually goes away after listening for a few minutes and trying to chill. Sometimes I have to check the house to make it go away.

There is a variation since i have kids that feels like its too silent in the house and something is terribly wrong with one of the kids. I have to check all three are breathing normally before it goes away.

[–] malformed3955@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

I used to be terrified of the dark into my teens. At one point I got fed up of being so scared, so when I was home alone and the feeling got overwhelming, I just screamed at it as hard as I could and walked directly down a dark staircase where the feeling was coming from. It felt like my nerves were on fire for a second, but I think it helped get something to click in my brain because the feeling has never been so intense since then, and I can usually ignore it or just go look and calm down.

[–] dingus@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago

Damn that's hardcore AF! Honestly, good for you! Takes some balls to do something like that when your caveman brain is going off with alarm bells.

[–] taiyang@lemmy.world 20 points 5 days ago (1 children)

There's an evolutionary reason we and other animals prefer to sleep facing the opening(s) of our rooms (for humans that actually means the top of the head is not same side as door).

That said, somehow bets are off as to which side we face once laying down; I prefer to face the wall I think because enclosed spaces make me feel safer, like a cat. Or maybe it reduces stimuli, or something.

Though lately I think my body likes sleeping on my right side since that side has more muscle, even though I'd rather sleep on my left for acid reflux reasons. Both are better reasons than the wall.

[–] victorz@lemmy.world 4 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Sleeping on the right-hand side is better for the heart though, from what I've heard. Less pressure.

[–] Zarobi@aussie.zone 10 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Sleep in a quantum superposition of left and right to reap the benefits of both

[–] SethTaylor@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago (5 children)

I sleep in a sensory deprivation tank. Will that do?

[–] victorz@lemmy.world 6 points 4 days ago

I sleep in a self-deprecation tank. Will that do?

I actually have taken many naps in sensory deprivation tanks and let me tell ya that is some of the best sleep I have ever gotten.

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[–] SethTaylor@lemmy.world 7 points 4 days ago

Oh my god that is so disturbing. Of all the kinds of horror creatures this is the kind I hate the most

[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 2 points 4 days ago

i only get sleep paralysis if i sleep on my back, and its not all the time, its usually if you are very tired the day before.

[–] Chezus9247@lemmy.world 11 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I prefer sleeping to a wall, for some reason.

[–] whimsy@lemmy.zip 16 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Back against the wall, so no monster attack. And eyes wide open to protect from new oncoming monsters from the front👍

[–] ExcessShiv@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Back against the wall, so no monster attack

How do you protect yourself from the monsters in the walls then?

[–] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 4 points 5 days ago

That's what the blanket is for, duh. And it has to be tucked in under the feet to prevent attacks from below.

[–] toynbee@piefed.social 4 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Oh no! Regardless of which way I turn, there's a wall!

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago (1 children)

First time sleeping in a coffin, what a noob

[–] toynbee@piefed.social 2 points 3 days ago

Hey now, no matter how talented anyone is at something, we all did whatever it is for the first time once.

For example, I've opened this post as nearly the first thing I saw after waking up three times now and I'm getting pretty good at not flinching!

[–] w3ird_sloth@lemmy.world 9 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Oh are you guys my guardian angels?! (°▽°)/

[–] smh@slrpnk.net 7 points 5 days ago (2 children)

My demented grandma saw people that weren't there. My mom called them her "guardian angels" because that was better than calling them ghosts.

They helped her do things. Like, normally Grandma needed help getting to the restroom. One morning Mom found evidence she'd used the toilet in her own. Grandma said "oh, the angels helped me".

Anyways, dementia is weird.

[–] w3ird_sloth@lemmy.world 8 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

Life is weird. Even for us sloths.

[–] Reborn_Mormon@lemmy.world 1 points 4 days ago

I'm a bearcat

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[–] Balldowern@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago

These two aren't ghosts, as light seems to reflect off their eyes.

[–] Reborn_Mormon@lemmy.world 2 points 4 days ago

You can just see them with your third eye, dummy, but you drink refried fluoride on a daily basis

[–] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 7 points 5 days ago

Looks like he is the little spoon :3

[–] Leviathan@fedinsfw.app 3 points 4 days ago (1 children)

It feels... Crowded? Cuddled?

[–] Sylvartas@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 4 days ago (1 children)
[–] Leviathan@fedinsfw.app 3 points 4 days ago

That's the word! "Juust right."

[–] affenlehrer@feddit.org 4 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Demons can also lure in the walls or beneath the bed. Looking into the room doesn't help you.

[–] turtlesareneat@piefed.ca 2 points 4 days ago

The most common reason a demon is in your bed is ... that you brought it with you! People are haunted a lot more than places are.

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