this post was submitted on 18 May 2026
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[–] TheGiantKorean@lemmy.today 18 points 11 hours ago (3 children)

I was speaking with someone about how at around age 40 to 50 you stop caring so much. Let them be "right". It doesn't affect me.

Also, I hope my dad enjoyed it. He deserved some good sex.

[–] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 5 points 6 hours ago

As you get older, you get better at recognizing when someone is just arguing to jerk themselves off. And if you're really trying to change things, then your time is best spent on people who will listen.

[–] iamericandre@lemmy.world 13 points 11 hours ago

We just finished up, your dad looks satisfied

[–] Quill7513@slrpnk.net 9 points 10 hours ago (2 children)

the key is neither the marketplace for ideas nor debate are good models for accomplishing anything productive. they do not encourage people to come to them ready to listen, but instead create an arena of professional wrestling in the format of "discussion."

a better model is the idea that you have a big pot of soup. your soup is your idea. you invite people to add ingredients to the soup. as a group, any time someone brings a new ingredient to the soup (a new mode of promoting and participating with the idea) you have the opportunity to integrate that ingredient or to say it doesn't go with the rest of what's already in the soup.

your goal, with your idea soup, is to invite as many people as you can to add ingredients so that your pot of soup is as big as possible and can feed as many people as possible. that means when you reject ingredients, you have to explain clearly why those ingredients don't belong with the rest of the soup

[–] Sabata11792@ani.social 10 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Pour hot soup on stupid people, got it.

[–] MeowerMisfit817@lemmy.world 4 points 7 hours ago

Smart people ALSO get the stupid soup.

[–] MML@sh.itjust.works 8 points 9 hours ago

I banged your dad

[–] Apytele@sh.itjust.works 13 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

I liked the bit in the 3001 space Odyssey (the one where they unfreeze Frank and his lack of a foreskin gets him ghosted)

"Nowadays everyone's either a deist or a theist. The theists believe there's at least one god and the deists believe there's less than or exactly one god."

idk, I think if any kind of deity does exist, there are probably multiple of them and that they're probably closer to eldritch beings than the gods people workship

[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 12 hours ago (2 children)

What reddit atheists and online atheists in general dont understand is that you simply cannot win an argument with someone who isnt willing to listen to reason and doesnt want to argue on the basis of actual facts. Its like trying to win an argument against a reactionary, you can try as hard as you want but at the end of the day they're just gonna respond with "nuh uh" because they arent interested in a genuine discussion.

[–] derry@midwest.social 6 points 7 hours ago

And someone banged their dad

[–] zarkanian@sh.itjust.works 10 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

I'm not necessarily trying to convince them, though. I might be trying to convince somebody else who might come along and read the debate we're having. My opinion has been swayed on numerous issues by arguments I read on reddit and other websites which I took no part in. In fact, it's easier to sway third parties, because they don't have to worry about their ego the way an interlocutor does.

[–] lobut@lemmy.ca 5 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

Yeah, that's why I sometimes in engage in online discussion when I don't want to because I can see that if it's only a certain type of comment then people reading could think there's a consensus.

Overall, I honestly think engaging in the atheism discussion was important because it allowed me to learn about religion more and what they believe in ... and in contrastI don't believe in it at all. It also made me discover parts I do like about religion like community and such.

If I'm being honest, I've never argued much about religion because I've long known that you can't reason about it. Religion not being real is a basic truth to me, just like free will not existing or absolute certainly being impossible. The fact that "God" is fake is less interesting to me than how and why people believe in him.

[–] lvxferre@mander.xyz 77 points 17 hours ago (7 children)

IMO the most important part of learning fallacies is not to call them by name while debating. It's to smell the bullshit from a distance. Both in the others' reasoning and your own.

That's what those Reddit kids are missing. This shit is not an "I won!" card. It's a reasoning framework.

(Sometimes I do still call them out by name. But that's usually a sign I'm already losing my patience with the muppet in question, and considering to block them [online] / turn 180° [offline] while saying "I'm not wasting my time further with you and your dumb shit".

I don't debate religion any more, though; unlike in my later teens + early twenties. Zealots get mentally tagged "irrational harmful avoid", and the sort of person who believes with the brain but not the liver isn't usually a problem.)

[–] Susaga@sh.itjust.works 11 points 12 hours ago

I feel like, if anyone calls out a fallacy and acts like it's an "I won" card, you should just pull out the Fallacy Fallacy and uno reverse that shit. Then fuck their dad as a victory lap.

[–] TotallynotJessica@lemmy.blahaj.zone 29 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

My personal preference is to always respond first in good faith, even if the shit clearly stinks. Sometimes they just worded things poorly or misunderstood something. However, if their stench becomes apparent, it's then much easier to humiliate them and dip by the second response.

[–] Bouchtroubouli@lemmy.world 17 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

Yes, I understand that you have a very compelling argument, but have you considered the fact that I banged your dad ?

yes, but I banged both your parents and every one of your friends, so I can't complain

[–] erev@lemmy.world 6 points 11 hours ago

i call out specific logical fallacies when my dad is going off on some bullshit and i want him to set aside his gen x jaded cynicism and actually listen to what I have to say. usually works pretty well but thats because he has critical thinking skills, which one would expect to be a prerequisite for a debate or even a stimulating dicussion but oh well.

[–] Signtist@bookwyr.me 9 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

To go a step further, arguments are healthier if they're pictured as a way to field test your beliefs to see if they hold up to scrutiny.

If you go into an argument trying to get the other person to change their mind, you'll often be met with failure even if your points were valid simply because people hate changing their mind, and you don't want to be tempted to use bad-faith arguments of your own just to secure that "win."

Instead, just give your argument; if the other person has a good point, see if yours can hold up to it, and change your outlook if you find that it can't. And if it feels like the other person is just saying whatever they think will "win," leave, because their argument wouldn't make a good field test anyway.

[–] zarkanian@sh.itjust.works 3 points 10 hours ago

And if you did change their mind, they probably aren't going to tell you. Or maybe you planted a seed in their mind that helps to change it years and years down the road. You don't know! That's the crazy thing. But people just get frustrated and give up because they had an unreasonable expectation about the argument in the first place.

[–] grue@lemmy.world 6 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Calling out fallacies isn't done for the benefit of the muppet. It's done for the benefit of onlookers who might otherwise fall for the muppet's bullshit.

[–] lvxferre@mander.xyz 2 points 8 hours ago

Problem is that simply calling out the fallacies won't convince most onlookers. They don't get convinced by reason, but by emotive appeal. Doing it like in the OP, and saying "I banged your dad", is often more effective.

I tend to call them as a second-to-last resource mostly as a final warning. "Stop saying dumb shit if you feel entitled to my attention".

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[–] zaphod@sopuli.xyz 19 points 14 hours ago (5 children)

The annoying thing about reddit/lemmy atheists is all they talk about is church and god.

[–] derry@midwest.social 3 points 7 hours ago

Not enough about someone banging their dad

[–] TotallynotJessica@lemmy.blahaj.zone 22 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

It's why despite being definitionally anti-theist, I almost never talk about it. I didn't even intend for this post to be about religion, but about moving past the urge to be an annoying debate lord. Once you realize that the winning strategy for debates is to have a troll mindset, you waste a lot less time on fruitless conversations.

[–] N0tTr0xy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 16 points 13 hours ago (2 children)

A troll doesn’t win the debate, trolls kill debates

[–] oatscoop@midwest.social 7 points 10 hours ago* (last edited 10 hours ago) (2 children)

On the other hand sometimes killing a "debate" is the best outcome.

How many times has some far right chud dropped of the radar after being absolutely humiliated?

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[–] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 12 hours ago

Sure but you cant win a debate with someone who has the power of blind faith and confirmation bias, they will never question their beliefs and look for ways to justify them.

[–] zarkanian@sh.itjust.works 6 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

No, the annoying thing is that they all talk about religion as if all religion is evangelical Christianity. They think that it makes them look impartial or something, but it just makes them look ignorant.

[–] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 1 points 6 hours ago

"People are getting killed by AIDS! We need to do something about this!"

"Actually most of them just have HIV, which on its own kills nobody."

I love it when they consider themselves instantly smarter than anyone else solely because they're an atheist. I love it when they call themselves free thinkers yet they all share the same 7 talking points as to why. And they lose their shit if you challenge any of them.

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[–] AbsolutelyNotAVelociraptor@piefed.social 47 points 18 hours ago (10 children)

"No, you're dumb. I refuse to elaborate" is my go-to when someone tries to impose their faith onto me now.

If they really insist and I want to lose some time, I tell them I believe Goku is god and make them dismount my argument. Then I use their own points to dismount their god and they usually get pissed because "it's not the same thing".

[–] roguetrick@lemmy.world 3 points 9 hours ago

Calling a monkey King figure a god isn't as outlandish as you may think.

[–] pieland@piefed.social 42 points 17 hours ago (1 children)
[–] Zink@programming.dev 2 points 9 hours ago

Torvalds of Film vibes.

[–] red_tomato@lemmy.world 35 points 17 hours ago (3 children)

The universe was created when Goku wished for it with the dragon balls. The sole purpose of the universe is to create a champion strong enough to give Goku a decent fight.

[–] N0tTr0xy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 13 hours ago

Oh my Goku, you are right

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[–] FreddiesLantern@leminal.space 5 points 13 hours ago

I’ve found that distancing yourself from the debate emotionally and being playful about it (like in op pic) works best. If you feel like there’s a lot riding on it, you’ll lose yourself in the debate.

If you approach it like it doesn’t matter (because guess what, in the grand scheme of things, it really doesn’t) you’re free as a bird to make a case and move on.

[–] youcantreadthis@quokk.au 4 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

I prefer to cultivate an actively painful to read style and just inflict that on them you can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themsrlvesinto

[–] TotallynotJessica@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 5 hours ago (1 children)
[–] youcantreadthis@quokk.au 2 points 12 minutes ago

But dies the way I write that's what matters

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