Plus if you really regret not having children you can always become a foster parent/adopt.
On the other hand: what if you do have children and you regret that? Start killing?
this post was submitted on 03 Jan 2026
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That's my answer everytime. Tbf I love children I just don't want to be a parent, but if some day I regret it I can adopt!
My family always say "oh it's not the same, you don't know where they came from"
MF my children would have more mental health issues than anyone out there. Also I have 2 dogs and 2 cats that I love more than anything and Idk where they came from either. If I can love pets I can love a child even more.
An adopted girl I knew would say "your parents were stuck with you, but my parents chose me!"
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Fake your death, orphan your kids, why kill them. Plus, it has a benefit that you can disappear from your old life and start anew! Somewhere in Finland or Norway or Japan.
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I never had kids, but being a school bus driver has made me regret not having kids. Being a school bus driver has also made me thrilled to the fucking core that I never had kids.
There's a H U G E difference between your kids and other people's kids.
As a bus driver, you're basically working in a penitentiary and coming to the conclusion everyone's a criminal. Well... Yeah...
Yeah, I don't really like other people's kids that much. I don't really like anyone quite the way I like my own kids either. But I don't besmirch anyone not having kids, I respect the decision. I don't want people having kids they don't want. I also know that I wanted kids, but after having them, and as they've grown, I realize I didn't quite understand it. But hey, this is life.
There's nothing wrong with having kids. There's also nothing wrong with not having kids. Why are people so aggressive toward the other side?
because (IMHO) a lot of people that have kids either didn't time it right or didn't think it through, or it happened by accident.
and they are now wishing to get their freedom back.
kids (I'm sure) can be great and worth the return on investment.. but there's immense pressure on them to do well as a representation of the parents.
sucks.. but it do be that way.
I planned my kids and still can't wait to get some of my freedom back. Both can be true.
No amount of babysitting or exposition can truly show you show how relentless having kids is. Timing and planning will help alleviate that. But you are still one flu away from two weeks of hell. And that's when your kids are healthy.
Absolutely right. I was living in a party house before I met my wife, and at that time I would've laughed at the idea I'd have kids. Fast forward three and a half years, and I'm married with a kid, and eventually two, and now they're not babies anymore, or toddlers, and so while they can absolutely still be a burden, it also comes with an enormous amount of upside.
I've always firmly believed that without winter there is no summer, and so nothing is always the ideal situatiion you'd like it to be. And so yeah, winter comes and my wife and I get that household anxiety that there will be a stomach bug, but it is what it is. We cancel plans, we've missed thanksgiving and Christmas, but we've also had amazing times that wouldn't have been the same without them. The good and the bad, and the ugly, because I like spaghetti westerns even though my family thinks they're boring.
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People overlook an obvious factor: having a kid physically changes your brain, and therefore how you perceive parenting. I know of lots of instances of this change happening anecdotally, someone radically changes their stance after an unplanned pregnancy.
Neither side is necessarily wrong, but choosing one or the other impacts who you are as a person so it's not as obvious as "I definitely [will/won't] regret it". So skip the social pressure and pro/anti natalist personal debates, but also don't hold too much blame against someone who struggles to grasp your mindset.
in 2016, there was a group in Spain that first looked longitudinally at moms who were recruited before becoming pregnant and then scanned for a second time a few months after the birth of an infant. What they found is going to sound like a bad joke, but it’s actually we think a good thing, which is the brain got smaller. So it lost some gray matter volume between that first preconception time point and the postpartum scan.
It's official folks, having kids makes you an idiot :D
I can buy this. I knew 100% I could raise a kid. I was fairly certainly I wanted children. We had my first kid, and I got more certain. Only as I had a second and they've grown older and I watch them develop and become people do I realize it was the right decision. I don't think you can know it's the right decision until it's done.
And the inverse (maybe not inverse) is true too, with people who knew they wanted to have kids, only to discover they were wrong.
Life's complicated for sure. That's it. I wanted to put a but, but there's no but. This is not a decision that has a clear right and wrong to it. It's a thing. There's 8 billion of us here, so it's not some special thing, even though it is.
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I would MUCH rather be unhappy that I didn't have kids than unhappy that I did.
Yep!!
In all fairness that's an awful comparison and they really need to just have better comebacks
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I completely understand someone not wanting to have or not wanting to bring kids into this mess, but I also don’t think this is a gotcha.
Over the years, I've changed my take on this. So what if a woman regrets it. She's the only one affected. Her decision. Her choice. A man can decide at any age to procreate so he is not as affected. Wife/partner doesn't want kids, he can find a woman who does. Versus having child(ren) that aren't wanted or supported who regret their own lives and have parents who regret they were born. Lots of regret all around. As to the grandchild loss and grandparent regret, there are plenty of kids out there who like having surrogate grandparents. Go for the least regret possible.
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