GOBLIN SHOVEL GOBLIN SHOVEL GOBLIN SHOVEL GOBLIN SHOVEL GOBLIN SHOVEL GOBLIN SHOVEL GOBLIN SHOVEL GOBLIN SHOVEL GOBLIN SHOVEL GOBLIN SHOVEL GOBLIN SHOVEL GOBLIN SHOVEL
this post was submitted on 08 Oct 2025
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Seriously, someone with internet search powers, please tell me where I can get number 3. I want to carry it in my pocket at all times and reveal it in the middle of conversations like a badge of my goblinage.
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GOBLIN ASS-SHOVEL
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GOBLIN ASS-SHOVEL
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- GOBLIN ASS-SHOVEL
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- GOBLIN ASS-SHOVEL
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GOBLIN ASS-SHOVEL
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IN ASS-SHOVELGOBL
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ASS-SHOVELGOBLIN
SS-SHOVELGOBLIN A
S-SHOVELGOBLIN AS
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SHOVELGOBLIN ASS-
HOVELGOBLIN ASS-S
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VELGOBLIN ASS-SHO
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LGOBLIN ASS-SHOVE
#4 looks like a shoehorn. Is that even concave enough to use as a spoon? Likely not. That's out.
#3 is definitely not a spoon. No idea what it is, but it's not gonna work well as a spoon. Not gonna deal with that one.
#2 is actually a spoon, but a small one. It'll be frustrating to use forever. I'd prefer not to use it.
#1 is actually a decent sized spoon. Oddly shaped, but it'll hold a decent amount of food or liquid. I guess I could live with that one.
3 looks like my grandmothers sugar spoon from one of those little jar and spoon sets
Mooooomin spoooon
As a bonus, I'm pretty sure #1 is tarnished Sterling silver.
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Four looks like the only one made of stainless steel. The rest will have a flavour.
#1 looks like tarnished silver. That's clean up easy.
Do we know if it's maidenless?
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Childhood memory of surprisingly disgusting pudding 🔓
Why wouldn't anyone choose 1? It's just a bit blocky, but a spoon nonetheless.
And the question said eat, so small spoons are available for cooking or jars when needed
It's the only thing that would even work inside a mouth. Don't get me wrong, I still don't want it, but 1 is the most spoon-shaped and endurable.
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If 4 is some weird ass moomin spoon like I think it might, definitely that one because fuck yeah moomin!
Otherwise it has to be the goblin shovel.
Do you hate soup?
Not OP but I reckon I could live life comfortably without one.
What's stopping you from using it for soup?
Yes and I'm tired of apologizing for it. Go enjoy your dirty puddle of a meal you slurper
/s
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3 and use it to threaten OP into letting me use a normal spoon again.
OP's lawyer here
I discussed your request with my client, and we decided to move forward with accepting it.
However, it's up to you, yo approve this decision. Your options are (a) use spoon number 3 for the rest of your life, or (b) use a normal spoon for the rest of your life.
Keep in mind that:
- You can only use the chosen spoon, no matter what the circumstances. For example, it doesn't matter if you forgot it at home, or you are trying to eat a steak.
- You may wash your spoon, when necessary.
- You use other tools for other jobs. Rule 1 only applies to eating.
- You may not change spoon if it breaks, or gets contaminated.
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I choose no spoon
has to be #1. Can eat soup comfortably, will balance in hand well without your hand touching the soup. Still small enough to stir coffee.
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2, all the other ones can go to hell holy shit i'd cry if i had to eat with them (yes, i'm neurodivergent hello)
But 2 is spiky in the back and it will stab your lips when you pull in out of your mouth.
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- Nice handle length and it's small enough to fit into most containers of anything I'm likely to need a spoon for
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I'd definitely pick 3.
First of all, if you can only eat with one spoon, you might as well pick a cool-looking one. Imagine being at a social event and people are handing out spoons to eat soup or whatever, and you're like "no thanks, I always eat with this spoon I brought from home". That would be kinda cringe and weird if you pick a spoon with a boring basic design. But if you pick the third one with it's interesting demon handle, it's gonna make you look mysterious. People are going to wonder and ask you about the story behind the spoon. Women will giggle at you and ask if you'd share the spoon with them.
Secondly, it has the most generally useful shape. Being smaller than the others can be very useful for eating from some containers. It has corners instead of being perfectly round, which allows a bit of scraping. But because the corners are rounded, you don't have to worry about leaving scratches or carving microplastics out of plastic containers.
Looking to introduce the spoon thing for non-autistics too eh?
My fingers. My. Goddamned. Fingers. Fuck you. I'd rather go through the sensory hell of shoveling chicken noodle in my gullet than use any of these textural monstrocities.
2 is the only one that doesn't look so big it won't fit in your mouth.
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#1.
Otherwise, you're a fucking moron.
you die a few weeks later, unable to clean your utensils.
4
This. Like, I might be crazy, but I’m kinda into #4.
None of the above, I will use my fingers instead.
in spite of myself i choose Saucy Goblin Spoon and am angry every time i eat cereal until i die
Going with Indiana Jones logic I'll pick 2
1-3 are out of the question
- 1: unpleasant form
- 2 and 3: unpleasant material (coarse/blunt, don't know the English word)
- 4: weird but ok
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The Spoomin is obviously the only correct choice here!
Gimme the little shovel. (3)
No.
Number 4 because its the biggest
I dislike all of them but if I had to choose I'd be spoon 1
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