this post was submitted on 18 Feb 2026
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me_irl
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So there was this girl in our friends group I was pretty into in college, but I never believed I was worthy, so I never had the nerve to ask her out. She then transfers to another school across the state and I figure that's the end of it.
A year later, she's returned to my school, and I fall harder than ever. It's my chance to make up for past cowardice and go for the one that got away! So of course I don't do anything.
She texts me one day and says she has an assignment that requires her to have someone peer review an essay and asks for help. I say sure, and she asks if I can come over the next night around 11. She mentions specifically that her roommate will be out of town, and that she's not in a relationship.
I go to her place, and she's wearing yoga stuff, the lights are dim, and there's music plating. She offers me a drink, and sits down next to me on the couch, and I know why she invited me over.
So I put down my drink, look her in the eyes, and ask for the paper.
She's like "Oh, yeah", and goes and prints a paper. I go to the kitchen table, turn on a light, and spend about 10 minutes critiquing it, finish my drink, and leave shortly after to let her get back to work on it.
I didn't realize what I'd done for like a year.
Ouch. And I find myself feeling it just as badly for her, because if she had only been slightly vocal about what she wanted she very well might have had you worshipping her for life. In a good way.
It's probably best for her, honestly. I really wasn't in a great place then. I have my life mostly together now, but back then I did not.
Well that's a very healthy response.
It kinda makes me want you to get in touch and pick up where you left off to continue this story! My dopamine demands it, lol.
But I'm worried that if you are still in touch, she lives 1,000 miles away and/or has a family.
F
This is so frustrating, it makes me want to go fuck the virginity out of him myself.
Luckily, I'm straight (I think).
Man this one stings.
Damn. How do you even make it more obvious than that?
She actually invited me to a party a few weeks later where every other guy was gay, so I think she decided I must not be into girls.
And I assume you blew that chance as well?
You know it!
My friend, you sound like the male version of me. In my case it ended differently because the guy who was into me is a stubborn goat and never gives up. But I did not get the hint at all and he had to spell it out to my face that he was in love with me before the penny dropped. At that point we had been hanging out, been penpals and chatting daily on MSN for two or three months and in hindsight he had been laying it on THICK the entire time. My mother in law has since told me that she had never seen him this lovestruck before. That it was so obvious to her and father in law that this was serious.
Meanwhile my dumbass thought he was just being friendly. I guess when you think little of yourself, your brain bars your from recognizing the signs that someone really likes you because in your mind it's nonsensical that someone could ever love you like that.
I do hope you found someone, my friend, and if not, I hope she's right around the corner.