this post was submitted on 07 May 2025
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] FooBarrington@lemmy.world -1 points 8 months ago (1 children)

No, you're approaching this the wrong way. You run towards it at full speed, then get a 45° angle and jump. While doing so, you grab their neck like a pole, and use the force to hoist yourself upon their back.

You either already killed them with this move, or you're now on their back and holding their throat. There's nothing a giraffe can do to throw you down or attack you now. You can just choke, and choke, and keep choking it until it falls to its knees.

[–] RvTV95XBeo@sh.itjust.works 0 points 8 months ago (1 children)

You lost me at "run". Can I bring my inhaler or does that count as a tool?

[–] FooBarrington@lemmy.world -1 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Oh, you're American? I guess you could drive your scooter up specifically designed ramp to reach their back. Though I feel most animals wouldn't stand a chance against you guys on their back.