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I think a lot of people make a very reasonable argument that a huge reason this anxiety even exists is because of patriarchy
Sometimes it not some patriarchy conspiracy. Just sometimes.
Nobody said it’s a conspiracy. It’s practically a natural phenomenon. Why would anybody be afraid that their child would look different from the other boys? Because they don’t want the other boys to bully him. Why do we all know that the other boys would bully him? Well, the good news is there’s a lot of research on this topic but the unfortunate thing is if you wanna learn more, you’ll have to engage with a word you don’t seem to like for some reason.
It's the same reason men want their sons to play sports and do manly things. Most of the dads pushing the patriarchal agenda aren't doing it out of some hyper masculine superego, they just want their kids to fit in. The really sad part is that it's because they know what it's like to not fit in. They perpetuate the trauma because they were traumatized.