this post was submitted on 14 Apr 2025
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I learned tonight that there's an unusual nodule at the top of my right lung, after feeling like I was pissing myself from the contrast CT. It's only 11x15mm, but best to catch these things early. I was having trouble breathing from stress, and after six hours it became a full-on panic attack, which I've only had once before, in 2009.
For those wondering, yes, I was a pack-a-day smoker from 1997 to ~2017 (a few bits back and forth ... you can't bring your own rig and juice into a detox). Because we're clearly mixing in PCP and no one will notice.
How’re you feeling about it? We’re all rooting for ya, Powder!
It varies by the hour. Sometimes, I have hope (I've signed up for my first DJ set a week from tomorrow at a regional burn); others, I see no future. It's been a rough few months.
I hope it gets better for you, seems like you’ve been through some incredibly rough turns this year!
I often think of the old saying “may you live in interesting times” and wish it’d be boring again; we’re all in for some more chaos I’m afraid. But what doesn’t kill you makes you tougher, stronger, harder. Hold tight, focus on pulling through day by day and hopefully that helps it feel less overwhelming. Sometimes looking at too much of the big picture can be paralyzing!