Not The Onion

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Man who claims he spent 18 days in heaven says Jesus is a '6ft Mustang full of testosterone' | News Weird | Metro News (metro.co.uk)

submitted 1 day ago by slothrop@lemmy.ca to c/nottheonion@lemmy.world

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[–] finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world 16 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Jules: You read the Bible, Brett?

Brett: Yes.

Jules: Well, there's this passage I got memorized, sorta fits the occasion. Ezekiel 23:20:

There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 7 points 15 hours ago

This was eye opening. I mean, it didn't hurt. It did go in my eye but that's how I read. I mean to say that everything went into my right eye, the donkey cock, the emissions. But not like that.