this post was submitted on 02 Aug 2026
243 points (99.2% liked)
Trans Memes
3281 readers
607 users here now
A place to post memes relating to the transgender experience.
Rules
- Follow lemmy.blahaj.zone community guidelines.
- Posts must be trans related.
- No bigotry.
- Do not post or link to pornography.
- If a post is tagged with a specific gender identity, keep the conversation centered on that identity.
- Posts that assume the viewer’s gender and/or contain potentially triggering content must be spoilered and tagged at the beginning of the post title. Example content-warning tags that you can copy include the following:
[CW: Assumes Viewer is Transmasc][CW: Assumes Viewer is Transfem][CW: Assumes Viewer is Nonbinary][CW: Transphobia][CW: Violence][CW: Weapons/Firearms][CW: Disturbing Imagery]
- Mods can be arbitrary.
Because it apparently has to be said, this community is supportive of all forms of DIY HRT.
Recommendations
- Include other tags in posts for example:
[Transfem/Transmasc/Non-binary]
- Include image description when possible.
- Link to source
founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
My workplace is like this too! There have been a couple times employees have been disciplined, even fired for a pattern of using the wrong pronouns or deadnames. And not just once. Once is a mistake, these people were doubling and tripling down. Idk where they got those people, but it's always a pleasure when the trash takes itself out!
HR software, though, especially Microsoft products, are fucking terrible at managing name changes and pronouns.
A few months ago I had to work one-on-one with a colleague in another department who I hadn't met yet. I ended up (unknowingly) addressing them by their deadname because that's what was showing for me in MS Teams. I was absolutely mortified, and apologized profusely as soon as I realized my mistake. My co-worker was very understanding but sadly this was mostly because it had happened to them multiple times already.
Turns out a bunch of us had (and continue to have) this "display" issue where a wrong name or image is shown, and the only "solutions" are to have all employees simultaneously delete hidden local caches and hope for the best, which is absolutely ridiculous, or just wait indefinitely, do nothing, and the data will magically sort itself out somehow. MS, true to form, claim that their perfect software, sculpted by the hand of God himself, is "working as designed" and that these things are not a big deal.
It took months to get the person's name change fully propagated everywhere. Somehow, their deadname STILL randomly pops up from time to time, like it's being pulled from some unknown stale DB copy that didn't get the changes, or stale cached data is flowing back into a DB somehow? Either way, a database containing employee data which is supposedly an authoritative store of truth, and mostly a collection of short strings, is not supposed to work like that, right? Since it's Microsoft, though, they can just ignore the issue, gaslight us, and continue getting away with causing humiliation. ADP as well is not far behind when it comes to data handling competence.
Nota bene: A similar issue is when people have only one name. I had a coworker who was in the system as "Fnu [her one and only name]". "Fnu" is not her name. It's a hack meaning "First Name Unknown" by a system that mandates a first name and a last name.
Thanks for taking the time to write all this out! I haven't been exposed to most of it but one of my non binary friends told me that it took forever and was a complicated mess to get a work email without their dead name (they go by their last name now, so ended up getting initials where the first name would go as a stopgap). I def. still saw their deadname pop up from place to place. And the high up supervisor, god bless him, tried and tried to get their name and pronouns right but he'd sometimes slip up if we was thinking hard about something else. But to his credit he fully committed to learning pronouns and names for everyone and really led by example.