this post was submitted on 17 Jul 2026
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[–] Canonical_Warlock@lemmy.dbzer0.com 78 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Asexual ≠ Sex Repulsed

Asexual = No Sexual Attraction

There are ace folks who are sex repulsed but it isn't the same thing. You can still have a sex drive without being sexually attracted to anyone. It's definitely not the norm but one ace person I know will basically screw anyone because it's all the same to her. While that's a bit of an extreme example, there are plenty of sex positive ace folks out there. Personally I don't feel sexual attraction but I still crave intimacy and sex is pretty intimate so it still fills that.

[–] Zephyr@sh.itjust.works 16 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Some of the kinkiest people I've known were ace, particularly in the bdsm community. Of the people I've known they were very into kinky and physical acts but just not anything involving sucking or fucking. Since their sexuality didn't involve genitalia they tended to be pansexual or rather attracted to people regardless of their gender. I feel like you see more people of that mindset in the bdsm and sensualist communities because a lot of the "sex acts" don't involve penetration or interaction with genitalia.

yeah ive encountered that, one of my online friends is ace, panromantic, and appears to be quite kinky

[–] TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (3 children)

some ace folks are just bullshitting about it all in a weird bid to seem cool and edgy and outside the mainstream of boring hetero or homo sex.

but so are a lot of people in a lot of different ways.

[–] Nefara@lemmy.world 17 points 1 week ago

This has "they aren't bi, they're just going through a phase" energy

[–] absentbird@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago

Idk, maybe they are trying to express something about their internal experience of sex more than their behavior.

[–] Gullible@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 week ago

Broadly true that people experiment with expressions of self and all that, but giving them the space to discover what and who they truly are breeds such extreme novelty and practical knowledge that it seems almost wholly unnecessary to even consider whether their present state might be their final one.

Do a few people get overly into understanding their sexuality? Sure. Do most come out the other end appreciably improved and wholler? Yes. Putting them down puts down those who need it the most.