this post was submitted on 16 Jul 2026
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Feminism
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You can sue btw. In most civilized countries, that's bodily harm and will be treated as such
I think some of the difficulty lies in proving whether it was intentional, since it could be accidental or a side effect of a necessary episiotomy.
I was astounded to learn how many women were given episiotomies without their knowledge.
If you can’t trust your partner to not secretly request to deform your vagina, you probably shouldn’t be having a baby with them.
Obviously this is more nuanced, so maybe allow two people in the operating room. A partner and an advocate.
I wouldn't even joke about it and find the practice abhorrent even as a joke, but it was done to my wife (we believe) without prompting. No sex at all until cleared by the OB/GYN she saw regularly (not the doctor who did delivery or suturing) and after the first time I made her ask if anything was different and the OB/GYN told us the suturing appeared to have been done wrong because there was an overhang and scar tissue. Second episiotomy with the second child, different doctor at a different hospital, everything was fine after the healing, so it seems like we just got shit luck with the first one
Oftentimes doctors do it without a request from the husband at all. Misogyny is intertwined with healthcare.
White men are often handed pain medicine prescription without asking. Women and people of color often can't get it if they beg.
Recently had my IUD replaced. The doctor looked me in the face and told me that they wouldn't be offering pain relief. But I could take some ibuprofen before coming in.
My father got a standing prescription for Vicodin just for some mild back pain.
That was my experience, too. It was absolutely brutal. Luckily, I was able to have it removed when I was put under for my bisalp a few years later.
On the other hand, I recently talked to a (male) gyno about my cycle being totally fucked up. One of the options for management was a Mirena IUD, and he told me that if I decide on that route, they'll bring me into the OR and do it with proper pain management and sedation.
That is infuriating, especially having heard tales of incorrect insertion and women suffering for weeks before the doctor decided something may be amiss and deciding to correct it.
If it's an accident, you have the duty to tell the patient. "Hey, ma'am, sorry to say, but I fucked up big time and I stitched up your vagina a bit too far. I'm terribly sorry, I can either fix it right now or, if any complications arise, please come see me again and we'll have it fixed." No issue. Mistakes happen.
But if a doctor is doing something like that and doesn't tell you - even if it's an error - he's to be held fucking liable.
Doctors don't admit mistakes like that.
Most husband stitches are done intentionally.
Then it's a crime and will be pursued as such.
Just one paragraph from the article that blows that suggestion right out of the water.
This isn't women not reporting to the right authorities causing the issues. It's systemic misogyny.
Ok
If you're still in healthcare, maybe you could take this conversation as an opportunity to be more open-minded when speaking with patients that have grievances rather than tell them that what they're experiencing isn't true.
Hahahahahahahahahaha
That's so funny.
You clearly didn't read the article.
In an ideal world someone would tell you if they stitched your vagina up wrong. However, we live in a world where they don't even tell you if they've cut through your taint, if you're a woman.
Nah, as someone who has spent a fair bit of time in the healthcare industry, I can assure you that's not exclusively a woman thing. Doctors these days don't want to admit mistakes in general. Must be some kind of superiority complex.
However, that doesn't change the fact that it's a crime and if you sue, you'll most likely win the case. Depending on the country, ofc. I'm not american, idk how it is over there, but I know of several cases in germany and austria where the doctors had to pay huge fees or even lost their license.
Sexism in healthcare is a pretty studied topic.
I get this response a lot when I talk about the trauma and sexism I've experienced first hand by doctors. It's dismissive and rude to be frank.
Yes. Women have it worse in the healthcare system.
No one will deny that doctors can be assholes to everyone, but industrialized medicine has been especially worse for women.