ADHD

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Relevant Lemmy communities:

Neurodivergent Life Hacks

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I can't stop when its time to stop (lemmy.today)

submitted 13 hours ago by Remy@lemmy.today to c/adhd@lemmy.world

25 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Hello, I have a big problem that interferes with every aspect of my life. And I want to ask you all if you experience this too and/or you have any ideas on how to improve this behavior?

The Problem

When I do anything interesting, or anything that just isn't completely boring, I can't stop when it's time to stop and start the doing the next thing. I always think, something like "Just five minutes more" and then I sometimes finish hours later than I had planned. This breaks all time-sensitive plans and also causes me to go to sleep far too late.

I don't think that its simple procrastination, because what I feel when I do it, is not about not wanting to start the next thing, but about not wanting to stop the current thing.

List of things I already do / have already tried

Setting up alarms that remind me that I need to stop doing the current thing and start doing the next thing
Creating schedules
Configuring the Wifi Router to turn of at certain times: This is very effective (when I have taken out my SIM card before), but its only helping with cutting the wifi at the end of the day for bedtime, not other time sensitive tasks that are necessary to even enable me to sleep on time (like eating dinner early enough)
Buffer time: Most of the time I can't get my self to view the buffer deadline as the actual deadline
Reading books about habits: I read some books about habits, but these books are mostly about starting an activity, or don't starting an activity at all, but I need to do certain things, and stop doing them on time.
This list is probably incomplete

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[–] derek@infosec.pub 3 points 8 hours ago

I recognize reframing as an emotional regulation tactic. I struggle with a similar issue as OP and haven't considered treating my momentum management as an emotional attachment I have the ability to reframe. It made immediately intuitive sense to me though. I'm going to try that out. Thanks!

P.S. The more therapy and self-work I do the more it seems we're all still kids wrestling with coping mechanisms and survival strategies that no longer work for us. Wading through different stages of trying to understand why and (hopefully) seeking alternatives.