this post was submitted on 09 Jul 2026
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Back when I was a wee little shit, and the parents were ritualistically sacrificing my Sunday mornings to Sky Daddy & Super-J by dragging my ass to church: I recall our pastor actually addressing this. Idr the verse he referenced, but it boiled down your 'soul' or some shit being driven to god even if you haven't been exposed to him here on Earth. TLDR, even if you don't know, you still go to hell for being a dirty heathen, so good 'ol christians have a duty to go shove their shit down as many throats as possible to 'save' them.
Whether or not that's true to their lore, I have no idea - there are so many contradictions in that shit that you can basically make it say whatever you want.
Yyyyyyep.
My favorite was when I (white guy) lived in a neighborhood with a lot of majority-black churches, ladies would walk around on Sunday afternoons knocking on doors to “spread the news.” However, the second they saw me their faces would fall and they’d make a quick exit after a minimal pitch. It was obvious they were trying to recruit from the black community and my soul was not a priority to them. I’m sure it happens the other way around as well. Nothing against black people here.
In my experience, each flavor of Christianity handles this a little differently. IIRC the reason ~~the Mormons~~ Jehovah's Witnesses are extra aggressive about hounding your door is because they consider it an obligation to spread the good word, while there are other groups who just stay out of your business entirely.
WRT the quote, there's very little talk of heaven and hell at all in Lutheran churches in my experience, just as an example. Although I have only been exposed to the Norwegian state church, which is pretty laid back about most things, so your mileage may vary with other Lutheran churches.
Also, at least officially, the reason they baptize teenagers with the names of your dead ancestors is because they believe baptism of a physical body is necessary for salvation, AND that they will continue to pester said dead ancestors to convert to Mormonism in heaven’s waiting room.
If some random little shit who lied to his local bishop about cranking it three times a week will get dunked when they read the right name, apparently that helps with the backlog or something, and White Jesus really wants them to get right on that, I assume because his dad is up his ass about TPS Reports or something.
Grew up Lutheran. Its mostly singing songs written by old people about how awesome God is. Meh.
I thought Mormons were like a pyramid scheme. Only the top 300k Mormons get be be God of their own planet so they have to get more in so they can be at the top.
No, you are thinking of Jehovah Witnesses. Mormons definitely want all their members to go to the temple to be sealed to ensure their future right to rule their own planet.
https://www.equip.org/perspectives/jehovahs-witnesses-and-the-destination-of-saved-humanity-who-are-the-144000-witnesses/
You're right, I was thinking of Jehovah's Witnesses.
Mormonism is truly insane. it's a super interesting rabbit hole to investigate.